Rab Nahin Bana Di Yeh Bosudi Review

Total garbage.

Immune to our cries of mercy, oblivious to our pain and without a flicker of remorse, two Bollywood veterans unleash a 167-minute cruel nightmare in Rab Nahin Bana Di Yeh Bosudi oops Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi that boggles the mind.

What were the devil’s apprentices Aditya Chopra and Shahrukh Khan thinking, if they were thinking at all, when they made this piece of trash.

With no story worth speaking of save a newly married uxorious husband Surinder Sahni (Shahrukh Khan) making a monkey of himself to get his young wife Taani (Anushka Sharma) to love him, an inept screenplay that makes junk like Yuvvraaj and Drona look glorious, mediocre acting by Shahrukh Khan and Anushka Sharma that make the grotesque Tamil film stars seem great and soporific dialogs that have less life in them than Manmohan Singh’s speeches, Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi heaps more shame on Bollywood and fresh infamy on the fading Yash Raj Films banner.

And mucho disgrace on Shahrukh Khan and Aditya Chopra as well.

To ask the audience to believe that a woman can’t recognize her husband just because he’s removed his mustache and donned a flashy dress (and even after practising dancing with him for several days) is to suggest that Indian moviegoers need a brain-transplant.

Au contraire, it’s Yash Raj Films’ heir apparent – and the mooncalf behind Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi – Aditya Chopra who desperately needs a brain transplant. After all, it’s this lobotomized bozo who is credited with the silly story, hopeless screenplay, banal dialogs and complete misdirection.

Mon dieu, the sheer arrogance of Shahrukh Khan in deluding himself that the audience would lap up any tripe he throws their way has few parallels in Bollywood.

With his affected mannerisms (Thank you Ji. Mention not Ji. Taani Ji…), lifeless dancing and flat dialog delivery, Shahrukh Khan is an embarrassment to behold in Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi whether as the mamooli aam aadmi Surinder with that forever constipated look or as his rustic alter ego Raj wearing that clownish mien.

Is this joker really the Bollywood Badshah?

Anushka Sharma is as mediocre an actress as Bollywood’s previous import from Bangalore Deepika Padukone, who made her debut in Om Shanti Om. Anushka resembles Sonam Kapoor (of Saawariya fame) from some angles but the buxom Sonam is a slightly better actress than this Bangalore boob.

In three crucial scenes (the initial confrontation with Surinder about not loving him, with Raj in the auto-shop and when Surinder tries the Sumo-wrestling nonsense), Anushka flounders and is all at sea. Send this schmuck back to Bengaluru with a one-way ticket.

Like the rest of the Rab Na Bana nonsense, music is drivel.

None of the songs are likely to stand the test of time. Both Haule Haule and Dance Pe Chance were so badly picturized that we have a hard time believing human were involved in their choreography.

Phir Milenge Chalte Chalte accomplished the seemingly impossible task of making the pretty babe Preity Zinta look like a weirdo.

A piece of trash like Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi begs to be shown the middle finger.

To all Shahrukh Khan fans whose hearts are aflutter and flesh aquiver each time their hero’s movies are released, we say to waste either time or money on this rotten carcass would be a sin.

Instead of watching Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi, you might as well commit harakiri and scoop your entrails out. That way, you’ll suffer lesser pain.

Related Links:
Critics Blast Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi
Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi Box Office Report
Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi U.S. Showtimes

40 Responses to "Rab Nahin Bana Di Yeh Bosudi Review"

  1. Þórarinsdóttir   December 12, 2008 at 6:26 pm

    Translation for “Rab Nahin Bana Di Yeh Bosudi” please.. What does Bosudi mean? For that matter, what does “Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi” mean?

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    1. You write: Translation for “Rab Nahin Bana Di Yeh Bosudi” please..

    Sometimes, it’s hard to translate Indian languages into English because the color is lost.

    Found this.

    2. You write: For that matter, what does “Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi” mean?

    Loosely translated as God made this matrimonial alliance/marriage

    Rab = God. Bana = create. Jodi = couple

  2. alihassan   December 13, 2008 at 4:24 am

    Read my review and what others have to say @ [link deleted]

  3. Þórarinsdóttir   December 13, 2008 at 9:37 am

    What language is that.. “Rab” and “Di” are not in my limited Hindi vocabulary.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    Rab is god in Hindi (and maybe in Punjabi & Urdu too).

    Hindi film-makers pander a lot to the Punjabi crowd in India & diaspora, lacing their dialogs and songs with Punjabi words.

  4. aditya_k   December 13, 2008 at 12:53 pm

    ‘Rab’ is what punjabis call their deity…..the film is bullshit….but did you hear the marketing strategy of aamir? he had all the staff of all multiplexes get the ‘ghajini buzz cut’ the day rab ne.. released…..everyone, from the ticket counter guys to the fellow with the torch inside, were sporting the ghajini look…..SRK was livid…..

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    You write: did you hear the marketing strategy of aamir? he had all the staff of all multiplexes get the ‘ghajini buzz cut’ the day rab ne.. released

    Interesting.

    Let’s see if it pays off.

  5. StrYngLad74   December 13, 2008 at 8:12 pm

    I don’t know about you, SI, but I am tired of seeing this mook-face called SRK and movie titles made from fragments of old (i.e., vastly better) Hindi movie songs. Glad to see another one of these duds fall flat on the face.

    Now, in the light of the Yashraj banner sinking slowly, can someone also knee Karan Johar (SRK’s secret knob-polisher) in the groin and spare us all the misery of watching his abominable creations starring the mook-face?

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi is a disgrace.

    Shahrukh Khan & Aditya Chopra should drop to their knees and beg forgiveness from all Bollywood fans (the Rab to the film industry) for inflicting this cruelty on humankind.

    We’re just back from Slumdog Millionaire. Now that is a movie.

    Full review of Slumdog Millionaire coming soon.

  6. soriram   December 14, 2008 at 7:13 pm

    Hey, I loved this movie. Thanks for the review. I hope you are finding a tough time criticizing all movies. Good luck with it. I guess you will be tired one day.

    Its hilarious that you repeat your reviews, may be a problem with your vocabulary. Rab only knows.

    good luck

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    1. You write: Hey, I loved this movie.

    Some people love only bullshit. Who are we to come in the way of their happiness. Enjoy (just remember to keep some Imodium handy).

    As for us, we’ll stick with caviar.

    2. Like most Bollywood movies, Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi was garbage. If calling this movie garbage is repetition, so be it.

  7. soriram   December 14, 2008 at 7:17 pm

    I’m waiting for Slumdog Millionaire movie review.. U seem to like that movie, which is in fact strange. I thought our views oppose. I like classy movies like
    Swades, Mangal Pandey, Taare Zameen Par, Hey Ram, Baasha, Anbae Sivam etc etc.

    and hate movies which makes the hindi folks alone laugh (like Dostana, No Entry…) where there is no reason to laugh.

    But i find you r always pissed off about any movie that is released. Too much expectation like hollywood eh?

    Let me wait for Slumdog Millionaire review…

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    1. You write above: I’m waiting for Slumdog Millionaire movie review..

    Here’s the Slumdog Millionaire review.

    2. You write: I like classy movies like ….

    It’s hard to associate the word classy with someone like you who professes to love (as you said in your previous comment) Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi.

    Generally speaking (with some exceptions), classless is a more apt term to describe your taste or lack of it.

    3. You write: But i find you r always pissed off about any movie that is released.

    Maybe, it’s time you learn to read.

    Here are some movies we loved:
    * Slumdog Millionaire
    * Tare Zameen Par
    * No Entry
    * Satya
    * Dil Chahta Hai
    * Fanaa
    * Anbe Sivam
    * Mullum Malarum

  8. SRINIVAS   December 15, 2008 at 6:11 am

    The movie did have its moments …Neverthless overall its bad …contrived Logic …especially ….trying to establish a diff between both the characters …just by changing the hairstlye and moustache …………and the climax ….wherein the heroine suddenly sees RAB (God) in Surinder Sahni …. one moment a ago she was ready to run away with the other Shah Rukh Khan ….

    The Heroine …i felt was quite ok for her first movie …. Shah Rukh was as usual …major let down was the script…

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    You write above: The movie did have its moments

    Yes, Rab De Bana Di Jodi had moments of inexplicable agony interspersed with moments of unendurable pain interspersed with moments of utter boredom. Nice moments, nah?

  9. tejamainhoon   December 15, 2008 at 10:51 am

    I have read quite a few of your reviews in the past few months, so please treat these comments as relevant to all your reviews, not just this one…

    Well, where do i start – your reviews (and subsequent comments) are such rich fodder that I am a spoilt for choice.

    I follow quite a few Indian (and non-Indian for that matter) reviewers as I am a big movie aficionado and right at the top of the small heap sit guys like Rangan Bharadwajan, Sudhish Kamat and to a lesser extent Raja Sen…and at the bottom of the pile is Taran Adarsh, quite possibly the worst reviewer I have had the misfortune of reading…but then, seemingly out of nowhere you appeared, pushed Taran Adarsh aside, dug deeper into the bottom of the pile and have firmly entrenched yourself at the very bottom. You sir, will not be dislodged easily.

    But I am not one to sully someone’s reputation without justification, so allow me to explain. I will not discuss your personal choice in movies here – that is, after all your personal choice and you have every right to like or dislike a movie. Although, if I may ask – you liked Hancock? I am Legend? Quantum of Solace? I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry? Hahaahaa…sorry – I digress. I had sworn to myself I won’t laugh at this.

    Anyway here goes…

    First – I would like to explain the concept of ‘apples & oranges’. Very interesting really what a couple of fruits can tell us about life. But here’s the basic tenet – you do not compare an apple to an orange! Simple enough. But yet day in and day out, you go on about classics like Pans Labrynth, La vie en Rose, Blame it on Fidel and several others, while repeatedly critizing Bollywood and hailing Hollywood. Uhh – these are not Hollywood movies, and secondly have no business being compared to the masala flicks of Bollywood . A fair comparison would be picking the top 5 ‘Hollywood’ movies and comparing it to the top 5 Bollywood movies. For example – here are the top 5 from Hollywood last week: The Day the Earth Stood Still, Four Christmases, Twilight, Bolt and Australia. Somehow the comparison is not as stark anymore is it? But where’s the fun in doing that? Might as well go on and on about the Bollywood ‘bozos’ right?

    Second, unless Meryl Streep has won her awards because of the size of her breasts, I don’t see the relevance of including references to someone’s anatomy. For example, would you have liked Tashan better if Kareena had bigger breasts, or for that matter Sarkar Raj if Aishwaria was better endowed? Can I infer that maybe your reviews would be better if you had a bigger dick? You see my point? Personal attacks are never cool. More so, when the attacker chooses to remain anonymous…

    Third – does a movie’s box office performance matter to your opinion of that movie? If it doesn’t, why keep harping on it? You make it a point to bring to the readers’ attention that Yuvraaj, Dostana, Tashan etc etc are faring terribly and hence your review is vindicated? Does that mean that because Om Shanti Om, or Singh is Kingg did well, you are now accepting that these movies were good? How does it matter how a movie did? I am truly confused by this one. Selective retention seems to be your forte.

    Btw – I am going to stop counting now – I underestimated just how many ‘points’ there will be.

    In one of your comments, you claimed that your reviews are unbiased. I was unfortunately drinking coffee when I read that comment. I should have been more careful. My IT folks are still pissed at me for spitting coffee all over my keyboard. I couldn’t help it – I have never laughed harder. You are not even in the same ballpark as unbiased. Infact, you and unbiased have not even been introduced to each other.

    Also, just a question I had to ask – do you have a software program that generates your reviews? If you don’t, you should get someone to write a program for you – because practically every single review of yours is identical and follows this familiar path: curse your bad luck for having seen said movie, insert generic comment on why Bollywood is in shambles, while praising Hollywood, make fun of the physical characteristics of the lead cast, including Abhishek Bachchan (doesn’t matter if he is in the movie), recommend a few foreign, oh sorry ‘Hollywood’ movies and thats it. Thats the review. Every single time. Not much difference between you and Ram Gopal Verma really – you both have been doing this for ages, and yet you both never learn. He atleast has Satya and Shiva to his credit.

    Also, while I am at it – explain something to me. How is it that you believe you have the right to curse Bollywood actors/directors etc, but at the same time admonish readers who use the same language against you? So for example, you can call a movie a piece of shit, a director or an actor is a heap of dung, but a reader can’t say the same about you? Interesting. You remind me of a kid I used to play cricket with in the streets of Bangalore. Every time he was given out, he would refuse to budge by threatening to take away the bat & ball since they belonged to him…you pretty much run this website the same way…

    Bollywood does not begin and end with 3 cinema halls in ny/nj – perhaps the most important reason why I dislike your reviews. You are doing a serious disservice to the absolutely amazing movies that are being made in Bollywood. Anyone who claims that all that comes out of Bollywood is crap has probably missed out on gems like Mithya, A Wednesday, Johnny Gaddar, Aamir, Tahaan, Khosla ka Ghosla, Rock On!!, Oye Lucky, Lucky Oye just to name a few. There are truly amazing movies being made in India. Just because they don’t release in the US theatres doesn’t mean anything. Do yourself a favor – you are a reviewer for god’s sake – go ahead and watch these movies. And then compare them to foreign films – that would be a fair comparison.

    Something else that I find rather alarming is that your reviews, comments etc lack even the most basic level of insight. You are so busy criticizing movies/actors/body parts that the entire review is hollow. One could read the first line of the review and then stop there. For example, I just read your review of the masterpiece Slumdog, and am appalled that you did not even mention Anil Kapoor’s performance. Infact you commented that Anil Kapoor doesn’t have that big a role – I guess according to you a role is unimportant if it is ‘small’. His portrayal of a jealous, envious and spiteful game host, all under the guise of rooting for Jamal was just extra-ordinary. On second thoughts – I am not surprised that you missed such a nuanced performance. Appalled – yes; surprised – no.

    Oh well – I could honestly go on and on. I have not yet touched upon so much that’s wrong with your reviews/comments. But this should give you a fair idea.

    Feel free to respond in your comments section, or personally (tejamainhoon at gmail). Although I am not sure what is it that you will have to say…it’s really difficult for someone to argue with me, but go ahead and try if you must…

    Btw – I am amazed, simply amazed that you write your reviews anonymously. I have probably never come across a reviewer who doesn’t put his name up against his or her work…come on – don’t deny me the pleasure of knowing the name of the worst reviewer I have come across.
    Please? Pretty please??

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    Vandatanga pa comedy pasanga (here come the clowns). Sigh.

    1. You write: I have read quite a few of your reviews in the past few months, so please treat these comments as relevant to all your reviews, not just this one…

    Did no one ever explain to you the most basic rule of the SearchIndia.com blogWe write the posts and you write the comments. Not the other way around, schmuck.

    At 1,334 words, your comment is exactly 1,334 words too long.

    Leave the bloviating to us in future. Comprende.

    2. You write: your reviews (and subsequent comments) are such rich fodder that I am a spoilt for choice

    Yes, we’ve been told that the SearchIndia.com is indeed an embarras de richesses. Yes dodo, we know what you meant.

    Some decades ago when we were at your current mental age, we suffered a severe bout of vomitting. The doctors in India recommended an anti-emetic tablet called Siquil. You really ought to take an extra dose of that tablet lest you profane our pages yet again with another bout of your verbal diarrhea.

    Your diatribe on the SearchIndia.com reviews is a wholesale slaughter on logic, a diabolical murder on the facts and an incoherent assault on the highest quality movie reviews (psst – we mean SearchIndia.com, of course).

    3. You write: I follow quite a few Indian (and non-Indian for that matter) reviewers as I am a big movie aficionado and right at the top of the small heap sit guys like Rangan Bharadwajan, Sudhish Kamat and to a lesser extent Raja Sen…and at the bottom of the pile is Taran Adarsh, quite possibly the worst reviewer I have had the misfortune of reading…

    You say, I follow. Need you even say that. It oozes in every word of your trashy thesis oops comment.

    What Macaulay wrote some 176 years ago about Cecil Burghley (adviser to Elizabeth I) is more apt in your case.

    He was by nature and habit one of those who follow – not one of those who lead. Nothing that is recorded, either of his words or of his actions, indicates intellectual or moral elevation.

    BTW, Taran Adarsh of IndiaFM is not as hopeless as you suggest. Sure, at times he’s boring and on occasion displays a tendency to superlative praise but he can still be redeemed unlike others (we mean you) who are beyond the pale.

    4. You write: But I am not one to sully someone’s reputation without justification, so allow me to explain

    After all the calumnies you’ve heaped on us in your logorrheic drivel, you have the nerve to say I am not one to sully someone’s reputation without justification.

    You are not the devil’s spawn, but his progenitor.

    Pray, let us know what dictionary you use because sully and reputation obviously have different meanings in your lexicon. Surely, it can’t be Webster’s, Cambridge, Oxford or the Bharadwaj Kannada-English dictionary (since you’ve referred to Bangalore, we thought we’d thrown in a Kannada dictionary).

    Most likely, the Dickheads’ Dictionary is your vade mecum.

    6. You write: I would like to explain the concept of ‘apples & oranges’. Very interesting really what a couple of fruits can tell us about life. But here’s the basic tenet – you do not compare an apple to an orange! Simple enough. But yet day in and day out, you go on about classics like Pans Labrynth, La vie en Rose, Blame it on Fidel and several others, while repeatedly critizing Bollywood and hailing Hollywood. Uhh – these are not Hollywood movies, and secondly have no business being compared to the masala flicks of Bollywood

    Indian film-makers – whether the hillbillies in Bollywood or the clowns in Kollywood – do not make classics. Period. Their target market is Homo habilis.

    For the most part, they shovel out unadulterated garbage. You’ve claimed that you’ve been reading this blog for months and if we’ve not driven that point home yet we’re doing something wrong or you’re a blithering idiot.

    Sure, not all Hollywood movies are wonderful. But they at least deliver the occasional masterpiece like Forrest Gump. Alas, all we get are the Cooum Dumps.

    7. have no business being compared to the masala flicks of Bollywood ?

    Keep in mind that 99.9999% of Indian movies are so-called Masala Movies (code for trash). So we compare with what’s available.

    We don’t know about you but we benchmark with the good stuff in life. When we pay $15 for a movie ticket, we don’t seek out the second worst movie.

    8. You write: I don’t see the relevance of including references to someone’s anatomy

    Obviously, we underestimated your stupidity. What world do you live in?

    The modus operandi of most Bollywood makers is fairly straightforward these days – Since we can’t bedazzle the audience with our brilliance, let’s titillate ’em with our titties.

    Do you think Bollywood movie-makers are showing a lot of skin (boobs, thighs et al) these days merely for artistic reasons.

    Some Recent Examples – Kidnap, Dostana, Aegan, Satyam et al. Grow up, dummkopf.

    If you haven’t seen the boob shows in Bollywood movies lately, we really doubt you’ve seen any Bollywood movies at all lately (you must be the only South Asian to have missed Minissha Lambha’s boobalacious scenes in Kidnap.

    Confession time, baby. Out with it? Have you seen any of the above Bollywood movies at all? Or are you just a hired hand out to throw mud on the most unbiased source for Bollywood Movie Reviews – SearchIndia.com?

    Since the milk of human kindness floweth strong in our breasts, we’re giving you the benefit of doubt and patiently responding to your sophomoronic (take that neologism) points.

    9. You write: For example, would you have liked Tashan better if Kareena had bigger breasts, or for that matter Sarkar Raj if Aishwaria was better endowed?

    Yes, yes and yes. They would have been the only thing oops make that two things that would have made Tashan or Sarkar Raj tolerable and watchable.

    Big is bountiful is the credo we (and most South Asians) live by. We are sure Dolly Parton has more desifans than Caucasian or Black fans. Need we tell you why?

    Now coming to your important points about if Kareena had bigger breasts, or for that matter Sarkar Raj if Aishwaria was better endowed All we can say is, from your lips to God’s ears, please.

    10. You write: In one of your comments, you claimed that your reviews are unbiased.

    Let the Good Lord strike us down if we said that in just one of our comments. As Rajinikanth is wont to say, Naan oru dhadavai sonna nooru dhadavai sonna madhiri.

    Yes, Unbiased, Fair & Balanced Bollywood, Kollywood, Hollywood and soon to come Sandalwood Reviews is our forte.

    11. does a movie’s box office performance matter to your opinion of that movie? If it doesn’t, why keep harping on it? You make it a point to bring to the readers’ attention that Yuvraaj, Dostana, Tashan etc etc are faring terribly and hence your review is vindicated? Does that mean that because Om Shanti Om, or Singh is Kingg did well, you are now accepting that these movies were good? How does it matter how a movie did? I am truly confused by this one.

    You are confused? We have no doubt. After all, confusion is your first and last name.

    Why do we talk about box office performance? Because we want to provide an unbiased source of information to our readers so that they can know how a movie has fared vis-a-vis other movies in the U.S. along with a comparative table. Hopefully, that information will be useful to them as they extrapolate it to a global desi audience.

    It’s not to blow our trumpet or prove to anyone that we’re right.

    We’ve never suffered from lack of modesty or a narcissistic disorder here.

    Once again, Fair & Balanced Reviews are our shibboleths.

    12. You write: How is it that you believe you have the right to curse Bollywood actors/directors etc, but at the same time admonish readers who use the same language against you? So for example, you can call a movie a piece of shit, a director or an actor is a heap of dung, but a reader can’t say the same about you? …You remind me of a kid I used to play cricket with in the streets of Bangalore. Every time he was given out, he would refuse to budge by threatening to take away the bat & ball since they belonged to him…you pretty much run this website the same way…

    Now, you are talking utter baloney because most of the comments on this blog are nothing but critical of us. There’s not a filthy expression in Hindi, Tamil and English that has not been hurled at us.

    Yet Gandhi like, we not only take all the criticism but we also publish the unbowdlerized versions (at least 99.99% of the time unless something really gets our goat like morbid profanity, racist nonsense et al). Just read the comments on Billa, Dasavatharam, Aegan, Satyam, Sarkar Raj et al.

    Yes, despite the constant stream of brickbats we treat everyone here with utmost deference. After all, athithidevo bhava is the Indian creed we subscribe to. Yes, humility and modesty are our first and last names respectively.

    13. You write: Can I infer that maybe your reviews would be better if you had a bigger dick?

    Your tool wouldn’t be long enough to measure our schlong. What did ya think – that everyone would be cursed with your Napoleonic dick.

    14. You write: You are doing a serious disservice to the absolutely amazing movies that are being made in Bollywood. Anyone who claims that all that comes out of Bollywood is crap has probably missed out on gems like Mithya, A Wednesday, Johnny Gaddar, Aamir, Tahaan, Khosla ka Ghosla, … just to name a few. There are truly amazing movies being made in India. Just because they don’t release in the US theatres doesn’t mean anything. Do yourself a favor – you are a reviewer for god’s sake – go ahead and watch these movies

    Maybe, maybe not.

    If a movie does not release in the U.S., there’s not much we can do. We usually wait for Netflix.

    Wait, we’ve seen Johnny Gaddar.

    15. You write: I just read your review of the masterpiece Slumdog, and am appalled that you did not even mention Anil Kapoor’s performance

    Stop pimping for Anil Kapoor because he was (almost) irrelevant in the big picture. If Danny Boyle had installed a cockroach in the host’s seat, Slumdog Millionaire would have still had the same impact.

    16. You write: Oh well – I could honestly go on and on

    We have no doubt that you could go droning on and on. But we take umbrage to the word honestly in your nonsense. Your so-called comments is as far from a comment on a blog as only antipodes can be.

    17. You write: I am amazed, simply amazed that you write your reviews anonymously

    The name says it all – SearchIndia.com.

    18. You write: Also, just a question I had to ask – do you have a software program that generates your reviews?

    Why did you even have to ask that. Sob, sob.

    We bring so much passion, vitality and energy to every review that you should know there’s a smart, sentient, caring & loving human writing all those reviews. Not humanoids like you disgorging last night’s dumpster food wherever they can find an opening.

    19. You write: you…. follows this familiar path: curse your bad luck for having seen said movie, insert generic comment on why Bollywood is in shambles, while praising Hollywood, make fun of the physical characteristics of the lead cast

    Must be our bad Karma.

    We not only have to endure the horrid Bollywood movies for the public good but also have to put up with asinine clowns like you.

    20. You write above: You sir, will not be dislodged easily

    Possibly, the only accurate thing (althought not in the malicious sense you wrote) in your lengthy boring prattle.

    Please, the next time you are desperate for attention – slit your wrist, get yourself bobbitized, drop your skirt/trousers in public or do whatever nonsense desperate dolts do to garner attention. Just don’t foul up this blog with another lonnnng piece of utter balderdash again.

    And now once again for the basic rules of the SearchIndia.com blogWe write the posts and you write the comments. Not the other way around. Verstehen, liebchen?

    21. In your part of the world (Bangalore), they have a phrase to describe your kinda nut – Tikka Ganchali.

    **************
    SearchIndia.com – Your most unbiased source for Hindi, Tamil and English movie reviews (and soon to come – Kannada movie reviews).

  10. reks   December 15, 2008 at 1:50 pm

    please keep your comments to yourself because it’s misleading to many visitors.

    Rab Ne Bana Di is not as bad as you criticized infact it’s quite entertaining.

    Try to watch a movie from a movie point of view. If you stick with logic you will never like a movie. It makes sense if you comment on a movie that’s really bad but not every movie is as bad as you think.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    1. You write above: please keep your comments to yourself

    What did you say?

    You talkin’ to me? You talkin’ to me? You talkin’ to me? Then who the hell else are you talking… you talking to me? Well I’m the only one here. Who the fuck do you think you’re talking to? Oh yeah? OK.

    Source – Taxi Driver

    Here’s the YouTube version of the scene.

    2. You write: Try to watch a movie from a movie point of view

    What the f*** does that nonsense mean? Pure drivel.

    3. You write: It makes sense if you comment on a movie that’s really bad but not every movie is as bad as you think

    You are right. Only 99.9999% of Bollywood & Kollywood movies are rotten.

  11. theMfactor   December 15, 2008 at 9:59 pm

    Well..the movie is unbelievable…and reminds me of tamil movie Anniyan…the way ShahRukh changes his outlook to woo his lady…

    Shah Rukh could ve chosen a better script…

    SI pl review Rang de Basanti . . .

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    1. You write above: the movie is unbelievable…and reminds me of tamil movie Anniyan…

    That was a typo, right? You surely meant onion.

    Anniyan is a million times better than this infernal nightmare Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi.

    Vikram is also a better actor than Shahrukh Khan.

    2. You write above: SI pl review Rang de Basanti . . .

    Rang De Basanti is dejavu at best and ennui at worst.

  12. 13ghosts   December 16, 2008 at 2:35 am

    SearchIndia – dude, ROFL. How much time did it take you to respond to that comment-story earlier? When I was reading the comment, I was guessing we have a challenge here. But you blew it away.

    Some things I’d like to share with other commentators – You owning a website / blog doesn’t mean you have to reveal yourself. Why should a reviewer tell everything about himself/’erself.

    I do not know the motivations of SI in giving these reviews (generating interest among viewers, driving traffic to the site et al), but it sure is pricking many people hard because all these days they were given shitty reviews.

    It takes balls of steel to publish reviews of this caliber and then publish all the insinuations and reply to ’em.

    I may not agree with SI all the time but it is insanely refreshing to read something different. Cheers!

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    You write: I do not know the motivations of SI in giving these reviews

    Merely the public good (ha ha, as if anyone believes us).

  13. tejamainhoon   December 16, 2008 at 11:02 am

    Oh man! you are just amazing…since you took the time to respond to my comments, let me spend a couple of minutes pointing out how contradictory your comments are. I am almost embarrassed to do this, but what to do – i am like this only:

    you write: “Yes, despite the constant stream of brickbats we treat everyone here with utmost deference. After all, athithidevo bhava is the Indian creed we subscribe to. Yes, humility and modesty are our first and last names respectively…”

    And yet you call me: schmuck, dodo, Dickhead, cursed with your Napoleonic dick, asinine clown, and finally Tikka Ganchali!

    to another reader, you commented: ..Also, in Brahmin homes (some decades ago), women were forced to sit separately during the four of five days of their monthly periods and restrained from any contact with others lest they pollute others. God, how we wish that during your crankly periods you are restrained from any contact with the keyboard so that we are spared from your infrequent bouts of nonsense.

    Deference? humility?? Are you serious? Am I missing something here? seriously, these are YOUR comments!

    You write: The modus operandi of most Bollywood makers is fairly straightforward these days – Since we can’t bedazzle the audience with our brilliance, let’s titillate ’em with our titties. Do you think Bollywood movie-makers are showing a lot of skin (boobs, thighs et al) these days merely for artistic reasons.

    Ok, so even if I were to accept the justification (however weak it might be) for your tasteless comments, tell me what is the justification of including them in the Sarkaar Raj review? As far as I remember, that movie did not titillate with titties.

    You write – Confession time, baby. Out with it? Have you seen any of the above Bollywood movies at all? Or are you just a hired hand out to throw mud on the most unbiased source for Bollywood Movie Reviews – SearchIndia.com?

    Haaahaa, I just have to laugh. oh man, this is just too much…who cares about this website? No, seriously do you really think anyone would hire someone to throw mud on this obscure website hhaaahhaaa and you say We’ve never suffered from lack of modesty or a narcissistic disorder here. hhhaahhaaa.

    You write “If a movie does not release in the U.S., there’s not much we can do. We usually wait for Netflix.”

    Ignorance is no defense! Like I said just because you don’t make the effort to keep track of all the amazing movies being made in India – doesn’t mean that they aren’t being made…I live in new jersey, and I have watched every single movie that I mentioned legally either through netflix, at the theater or by buying the dvd…and I don’t even do this for a living – I am merely a movie fan…

    Let me end by saying – you have a long looong way to go before you will be taken seriously…spewing venom, cursing readers, actors, directors, and everyone who disagrees with you just makes you look like a petulant kid who is pissed off with the world…

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    1. What do we have to do to get through to a numbskull that we do the posts here and you do the comments. Bring a sledgehammer to that numb-skull of yours.

    2. You write: oh man, this is just too much. who cares about this website?…this obscure website

    Whoever coined the phrase hoist with his own petard surely had you and only you in mind.

    There’s a reason we call you a schmuck and dummkopfYou are too dumb to even lie convincingly.

    * By your own disclosure, you’ve acknowledged spending months on this blog, which you abhor, consider obscure and don’t care about.

    * By your own tacit admission, you’ve spent tens of hours reading not only the posts here but also the many comments and our responses in a futile effort to pick holes on a blog that you consider utterly worthless and obscure.

    * By your own actions, you’ve written a comment (and a follow-on comment) that would rival the U.N. charter in length on a blog that you consider utterly worthless and obscure.

    Get real, kiddo.

    When we find something useless, abhorrent or don’t care about, we (and other normal human beings) avoid it like the plague. We don’t stick to it like a leech like you do.

    Since you so maliciously claim that this blog is tripe and if you are not enjoying our content but you are still lingering around here, what does that make you then? A whacko, stalker or an imbecile that you spend months reading worthless, obscure junk that you don’t care about and so obviously find contemptible.

    3. You write: And yet you call me: schmuck, dodo, Dickhead, cursed with your Napoleonic dick, asinine clown, and finally Tikka Ganchali

    The cap fits. So wear it.

    BTW, everything we said in our lengthy riposte was apposite and in context to the drivel you spewed forth.

    Lest you forget, let’s remind you that you brought up the issue of ‘dicks’ whether you meant it literally or figuratively only your addled brain knows (if it does at all)

    4. Yes, we are aware that in New Jersey you can rent Bollywood DVDs at Indian grocery stores for $1 & buy ’em for $5, two days after the movie releases in India (even if the movie never makes it to American theatres).

    We’ve largely avoided doing it because we love Bollywood and its smaller Kollywood sibling far too much unlike most desis in New Jersey and elsewhere here.

    5. You write: just because you don’t make the effort to keep track of all the amazing movies being made in India

    Are you a complete retard.

    We know you have a hard time reading straight, formulating a coherent thought or making a logical argument. But obviously your math skills are at the level of the worst fourth grade American school children.

    In a fairly short period, SearchIndia.com has added about 300 movie reviews (majority of them Indian). They include the good, bad, ugly, old, new and the rare classics. The movies on this blog include Hindi, Tamil, English, French, German, Portuguese, Spanish, Italian and Russian.

    They include good ones like Johnny Gaddar, ugly ones like Drona, old ones like Anamika, new ones like Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi, stolen ones like God Tussi Great Ho and classics like the Bicycle Thief.

    Mind you these are not user-generated reviews. These are movies watched & reviewed by us.

    While 300 is not a small number, the list will continue to grow further.

    That said, we will of course try & review some of the movies you’ve referred to (Mithya, A Wednesday, Aamir, Tahaan, Khosla ka Ghosla, Rock On!!, Oye Lucky, Lucky Oye) in your earlier dissertation oops comment.

    In line with our modest weltanschauung, we do not claim to be the fount of all wisdom and often watch (and review) movies based on readers’ recommendations. We’ll follow the same path with your suggestions as well.

    6. You write: Let me end by saying – you have a long looong way to go before you will be taken seriously

    Taken seriously? By who? The day we hanker for public approbation or shy away from public reproach, we’ll hang up our saddle.

    Now it’s time for you to get off the frothing, epileptic transit train, baby.

    **************
    SearchIndia.com – Your most unbiased source for Hindi, Tamil and English movie reviews (and soon to come – Kannada movie reviews).

  14. asha.tampa   December 16, 2008 at 11:04 am

    Havent watched the movie; the storyline had me gagging so much, I’ve been religiously avoiding the theatres where Rab Ne… is currently playing, heh. Read yr review, and yeah, agree with ya, I mean, like in Dostana, is the girl blind? How the hell can a girl not recognize her husband?! And SRK in the guise of the uncle looks so yucky, he must’ve scared all the girls away.

    I had a great time reading your review as usual, snickered at the comments, and laughed at yr replies, you must bear a sign henceforth, that says Above 18 only 😉

    Btw, jus wanted to share this with you, am leaving my job as a Corporate Sales person (which I’ve been doin for 2+ yrs) and joining a startup company (it’s a website, hasnt been launched yet) as an Editor. They liked my blog, and hired me, heh. Needless to say, I’m damn nervous, wondering whether I can do justice to the job or not, wondering whether I’ve made the right decision. Do wish me luck! I need all the luck in the world right now! 🙂

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    1. You write above: Btw, jus wanted to share this with you, am leaving my job as a Corporate Sales person (which I’ve been doin for 2+ yrs) and joining a startup company (it’s a website, hasnt been launched yet) as an Editor. They liked my blog, and hired me, heh.

    Congrats.

    As we said a few months back, you have a nice writing style. Writing isn’t as easy as some folks think it is.

    2. You write: They liked my blog, and hired me

    Yipee, there’s hope for bloggers.

  15. tejamainhoon   December 16, 2008 at 12:03 pm

    You write: “To ask the audience to believe that a woman can’t recognize her husband just because he’s removed his moustache and donned a flashy dress (and even after practising dancing with him for several days) is to suggest that Indian moviegoers need a brain-transplant.”

    I agree – how can Bollywood make such nonsense? Hollywood would never make something so stupid!
    What’s that you say? Superman?
    Uhhh, ohhh – come on that’s not the same! Superman & Clark Kent look completely different! I mean Clark Kent wears glasses!!!
    Sorry what – so does Shahrukh khan? Uhh uhhh – But i am sure Clark Kent has facial hair that completely hides his natural features….
    Oh – he doesn’t? really? But you say – Shahrukh Khan sports a moustache…hmmmm
    But, but…Shahrukh Khan has a wife! Surely a wife should be able to tell – and Superman does not have a woman in his life??? Lois Lane? – now who is that? Never heard of her…

    Nonsense – there is no way Hollywood would do something so silly. And that’s that.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    Were you the same clown advising us on the dubious practice of comparing apples to oranges.

    You are comparing Superman to Rab Ne Bana e Jodi.

    When it comes to plumbing the depths of idiocy, you are non pareil.

    Superman is a genre in itself where the concept of suspension of disbelief is stretched to the utmost in the cause of entertainment.

    Superman taps into the deepest recesses of human beings for the dream to do incredible things – Who hasn’t dreamt of doing marvelous feats to fly, to crush evil, to move mountains, to be invincible …? Surely, no one’s ever dreamt of being a Surinder Sahni-like character in Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi except that every guy wants a pretty girl (well, not every guy because some guys may want a pretty guy too these days).

    Yes, it’d been good if they’d stopped after the first or second Superman movies because they then got boring.

  16. beni   December 16, 2008 at 1:55 pm

    “Read my review and what others have to say @ [link deleted]”

    hahahahahhha.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    We let the link stay for three days & then removed it.

    The SearchIndia.com blog was not set up to make it easy for others to piggyback on.

  17. Þórarinsdóttir   December 16, 2008 at 8:19 pm

    The SearchIndia.com blog was not set up to make it easy for others to piggyback on.

    Well, you left alihassan’s hyperlinked username untouched.. so you are not as ruthless as you claim to be 😉

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    1. You write: so you are not as ruthless as you claim to be

    Gosh, when did we ever claim to be ruthless.

    If you really want to know, ruthless is the antonym for SearchIndia.com.

    We’ve always tried to project an image of we’re-all-one-happy-family-here on these pages, haven’t we.

    We are – as they say in Latin – merely unus inter pares.

    2. You write: Well, you left alihassan’s hyperlinked username untouched..

    This is a tricky issue that we’ve thought about and decided to let people link their user name to their home page or a favorite photo like Dark Knight or their favorite book or personal blog et al.

    But we’ve drawn a line when it comes to promoting a specific page that directly competes with what we do. Even here, we leave it for a few hours or a day or two and then pull it.

  18. StrYngLad74   December 16, 2008 at 9:35 pm

    “Anniyan is a million times better than this infernal nightmare Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi.

    Vikram is also a better actor than Shahrukh Khan.”

    I’d have to disagree with you guys on this one. “Anniyan” also purveyed the same illogical bullshite that you accuse “Rab ne bana di jodi” of. At least SRK had a mustache in the latter. Vikram’s REMO character had nothing besides hair-highlights to distinguish him from the mild-mannered AMBI….not even a hint of facial hair. How dumb and blind was Nandhini (Sadha) in “Anniyan”? Certainly more than Taani (Anushka Sharma) in RNBDJ.

    Let’s also not forget the torture scene in “Anniyan” when AMBI is “frozen” by adiabatic cooling in a water tank by Prakash Raj. Anyone with some knowledge in physical chemistry would know that adiabatic cooling involves no heat transfer between the medium and the surroundings, and thus requires decreasing the pressure immensely or by demagnetization. I doubt if a police station has such equipment to carry such an elaborate torture technique. Plus, wouldn’t the pressure loss and demagnetization affect Ambi’s body? Also, ADIABATIC does not mean AMBI’s body is not going to lose heat. It’s the water that won’t lose heat during cooling, because that’s the medium being cooled. Ambi’s body would continue to lose heat to the cooling water and he’d go into thermal shock and die of hypothermia.

    None of the above happens, and he smoothly transitions into his violent alter-ego of Anniyan, smashes the ice block into smithereens (whoa!!), and beats up about 10 cops without missing a step. Stupidity galore, mates…no matter how you spin it.

    Plus, I don’t even think Vikram is a better actor than SRK. I think both are the archetypal OVER-ACTORS, who have a couple of good performances to their credit in their careers. Vikram has the onus because he has a National Award, whereas SRK does not. Personally, the only reason I find Vikram more tolerable is because he doesn’t bleat like a goat when he opens his mouth.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    You write above: Personally, the only reason I find Vikram more tolerable is because he doesn’t bleat like a goat when he opens his mouth.

    Best sentence in above comment. 🙂

  19. gk   December 18, 2008 at 4:52 am

    ambi and remo are different characters by speech,style,mannerisms and motive…thats wat u shld look for…and not merely the hair style….

  20. gk   December 18, 2008 at 4:54 am

    And btw wat kind of stunts did charlies angels have?

  21. vijayjoshi   December 19, 2008 at 8:51 am

    Dear Mr.Reviewer,

    just read your review on rab ne,a fantastically phrased mindless garbage,a masterpiece to be kept in records under the head ‘the most stupid review ever’.

    I think you dont know the C of cinema and have a lot of time typing these ‘shits’ with a dictionary in hand (it would have been great had you written the meanings also). Now coming to the review,
    you have used quite a few words that relates to cinema also,like direction,choreography,script,screenplay,acting,story etc.,I seriously doubt whether you know the meaning of these words.

    I think you should start reviewing documentaries on Geography Channels and others, where you will find logic and everything which will not require Brain transplant, or can also try Pornographic Movies like “suhaagraat” ,’Lund ko choos’,’Bosudi mein daal” and others.

    You see, I am short of words in my dictionary to curse you for reviewing the movie. It would be a great blessing on indian cinema and its viewers if you stop reviewing movies from now onwards.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    1. You write above: Dear Mr.Reviewer,

    Did you take a peek at our crown jewels when we were asleep? It could be Ms.Reviewer too.

    2. You write above: It would be a great blessing on indian cinema and its viewers if you stop reviewing movies from now onwards.

    Filius tu canis et cameli.

    3. You write: I think you should start reviewing documentaries on Geography Channels and others

    Are you a mind-reader? We are adding more documentaries. Soon to come – Manda Bala.

    We do have some already – Sicko and Religulous.

    4. You never said in your rant why you consider our review to be drivel. Or is that too much to expect from an addled brain.

    5. You write: You see, I am short of words in my dictionary to curse you for reviewing the movie.

    Yes, you are short of many things including a head. Get a life, schmucko. That’s just a review and Rab Ne is just a movie.

  22. vijayjoshi   December 20, 2008 at 2:30 am

    thats right mr or ms. or in between(?), I am short of my head whenever I see or read something headless, brainless, mindless.
    Thanks so much for adding documentaries also,but mt suggestion was that, you should keep ONLY documentaries in your idiotic reviews.
    you ask “why you consider our review to be drivel”, my suggestion would be, why dont you try reviewing you own reviews and I am sure you will get an answer.
    you say “Thats just a review and Rab Ne is just a movie”, I would say yours was not just a review,it was a total “BOSUDI” (your favorite word) and that Rab Ne is not just a movie,its a great movie that needs to be watched by heart along with Head, and I think you only have a big,very big head,and that too empty,over your shoulders.
    Try watching movies with heart also next time and please write some sensible reviews.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    You write above: Rab Ne is not just a movie,its a great movie that needs to be watched by heart along with Head,

    WTF does the above meaningless ass-ault on the English language mean.

    a great movie that needs to be watched by heart along with Head? Feel free to shove your head and heart all the way up SRK’s derriere. Who are we to come in the way of your bawdy pleasures. After all, different folks, different pleasures.

    Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi is not a movie but a horrible crap show where a wife doesn’t recognize her husband without his moustache, where a wife is ready to elope with her dance partner one moment and the next moment has a Buddha-like enlightenment about her husband…Not for nothing has this movie been universally panned by critics.

    Yes, we know that you love this junk.

    As we’ve said ad nauseum ad infinitum some people will love anything because they can’t distinguish garbage from gold. It’s all the same to them (yes, schmuck we are talking of you here).

  23. araj   December 21, 2008 at 4:59 am

    You write above in response to tejamainhoon’s comments-

    “Superman is a genre in itself where the concept of suspension of disbelief……Superman taps into the deepest recesses of human beings for the dream to do……… some guys may want a pretty guy too these days)”…

    I would say that’s one of your best responses and I like it because, often you guys choose to respond more in jeu d’esprit (of course, you are quite good at it) than by dissection proper. But your response above is an exception for once.

    But my point here is, why do you have to defend Hollywood always?? Trying to defend Hollywood on the basis of point by point comparison is treacherous and you cannot keep doing it forever in response to every venomous attack on Hollywood like that of the guy above simply because Hollywood does make junk movies (most of them actually)…yes…agreed..accepted….However, the
    arguement here is not about ‘absolute perfection’ of Hollywood (it cannot and should not be really), but about the degree of refinement…..Hence, I propose the following 4-point universal formula for comparing Hollywood and Indian cinema….

    1. Their crap is lot lot lot to the power of n better than our crap. Period.

    2. We copy most of their crap and we,strangely, claim our crap to be better than their crap,which we actually copied in the first place to make our crap, by calling it crap.

    3. Their better is better than our best

    4. And their best simply has never been bested by ‘what we claim to be’ our best and probably will never be.

    The above formula takes care of everything. Doesn’t it??

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    1. Yes, we agree with the four-points.

    2. You write: why do you have to defend Hollywood always ?? Trying to defend Hollywood on the basis of point by point comparison is treacherous and you cannot keep doing it forever in response to every venomous attack on Hollywood

    Valid point, particularly on the treacherous pitfalls.

    Not sure if we defend Hollywod all the time but sometimes folks throw down the gauntlet with an asinine comparison that makes us want to blast to smithereens the silly point.

  24. beni   December 21, 2008 at 3:17 pm

    fine, it wasn’t well made or well written in bits and parts. But Anushka + Shahrukh as Suri did a good job.
    AND I thought it was really, really, reallyyyy sweet.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    You write: it wasn’t well made …. But…. I thought it was really, really, reallyyyy sweet

    Weird.

  25. beni   December 22, 2008 at 2:59 pm

    what weird?

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    ??

  26. beni   December 22, 2008 at 5:42 pm

    what is weird?

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    Ah, now we see.

    We were referring to wasn’t well made and really, really, reallyyyy sweet in the same sentence.

  27. beni   December 22, 2008 at 6:25 pm

    how is it weird?
    How is me thinking the movie was v. sweet correlated to me thinking it wasn’t well made?
    I enjoyed watching it!
    Don’t reply.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    OK, Grandma or (more likely) Granddaughter.

    Enjoy your Khan of worms.

  28. bollywood_basher   December 30, 2008 at 2:28 pm

    Rab ne Bana di Jodi becomes my most hated movie of all times after that classic called “Mohabbatein”, which not surprisingly, both has Clowns Sharukh Khan and Aditya Chopra associated with it.

  29. bollywood_basher   December 30, 2008 at 3:00 pm

    Shahrukh fans have gone nuts.

    You dont need a heart to review any movie.
    Actually i dont think these guys and gals have hearts(or the sensitive part of brain) which is perfectly fine with me.

    Even if you review with your heart, Rab bana di’ is a trash which you throw into a dustbin at first glance.

    I love your Latin insults, but foreign language never produces the desired results.

  30. 1012900   January 4, 2009 at 9:23 am

    Can u guys pls review SRK’s “Dil Se”??

    I haven’t seen the movie till now 🙁 but heard it was LOVELY.. and Music by ARR s AWESOME.. I just can’t stop listening to all the songs.. especially Ae Ajnabi…

    Sharukh Khan was a really good actor back then.. Don’t know what happened to him over the years.. he’s become an average actor now.. if only he could soar again..!!

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    Will do.

  31. soundari   January 5, 2009 at 7:59 pm

    Rab ne bana di jodi is an excellent family movie. I liked it a lot. It is a decent family movie. Movies of sharukh is always good. The songs in this movie is very nice. All peoples from respectable family will like this movie a lot. Sharukh playing the role of ordinary man is fabulous. I expect these type of movies in future. Sharukh once again rocked in the movie. I love this movie a lot. Movie is excellent, fantastic, good, beautiful, nice, outstanding. I dont have words to express my feelings.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    1. You write above: Movie is excellent, fantastic, good, beautiful, nice, outstanding. I dont have words to express my feelings.

    Buy a better thesaurus, sweetie.

    That way, you can add exceptional, remarkable, great, splendid, nonpareil, superb, unexcelled, top-drawer

    See, you’ll never again be stumped for words to express your gushing feelings for Shahrukh Khan movies.

    2. You write: Movies of sharukh is always good

    Are you human?

  32. hgquinn   June 28, 2009 at 12:58 pm

    Finally saw this on DVD, having missed it in the theaters. Agree on the picturizations of Haule Haule and Dance Pe Chance — they were too loosely conceived and produced. Agree SRK overacted from start to finish, but I thought he was doing a deliberate caricature, in a Charlie Chaplinesque way. Anushka was meant to play a lighthearted young woman with an intermittent streak of willfulness, and she did pretty well. I’d fault the writing for any flaws in her character, not her acting. The now-stock dance number with multiple star guest appearances has lost its ability to surprise, so Phir Milenge Chalte Chalte, with predictable choreography and no surprise factor, was boring.

    However, Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi has three positives, one of which has seriously heavy value.

    The first is: the first fifteen minutes of the film are beautifully shot and edited. If the entire film had been shot and edited that well, it would have been a visual and dynamic work of art. Here I fault the director, for not keeping up a consistent integrity in his approach. This is a flaw I’ve see in a lot of the Bollywood films of the past several years.

    The second is: Tujh Mein Rab Dikhta Hai. This is one of the most emotionally profound lyrics about what love feels like that I’ve ever heard. It’s sensitively scored and sung. The picturization was very good, I thought. It could have been even better, I know. However, the song itself is so beautiful that the picturization really doesn’t matter.

    The third is the premise itself, that one sees God in one’s beloved, if the love is a true love. This is food for the soul, solace for those who love, support for the difficult times in love. This alone makes Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi a film to treasure over the years. Maybe you’re snickering at that idea. But this is how it seems, to me.

    Like Saawariya, Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi is a highly-stylized fairytale with a moral, something like The Wizard of Oz, The Umbrellas of Cherbourg, or The Princess Bride. Rab Ne is at least truer to its Bollywood masala roots than Saawariya, which was a visually beautiful, but emotionally hollow, attempt to do a European-style film.

    Rab Ne is emotionally honest. It has a sound story-telling basis, in that respect. Rab Ne’s moral, that true love is when you see God in your beloved, is completely true. I don’t know of any other film that states this truth so baldly. The power of Rab Ne is in this emotional truth, which seems all the more clear to the viewer because of its contrast with the fairytale-cartoon style of the film’s setting and design.

    Bollywood films’ strongest general quality is their ability to depict real human emotions inside a shell of theatricality — coating serious truths with sweetness, playfulness, suspense, humor, etc. Rab Ne is a very good Bollywood film, if judged according to that quality. It isn’t a Satyajit Ray film, true. But then it wasn’t meant to be, was it?

    I’ve indirectly argued before that India, via Bollywood, has something to tell the rest of the world about love, compassion, caring. Rab Ne does the job. To measure the output of one culture by another culture’s yardstick is valid, I guess. But isn’t it at least as valid to use each culture’s own yardstick to measure its own cultural output? I believe it’s from our differences that we learn best how to become deeper-feeling, more caring people. Our differences are good, not something to be disparaged.

    Coincidentally, I had ordered The Princess Bride from Netflix, and watched it the same night I saw Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi. I first saw TPB in 1990, and have rewatched it every couple of years. It doesn’t lose its charm. It, too, is acted with over-the-top (though good-natured) caricatured approaches by most of the actors. Rab Ne Ne Bana Di Jodi was as charming as TPB. As imperfect, too, but just as genuine in its message about love. And Rab Ne’s message about love is a deeper one than TPB’s. I look forward to rewatching Rab Ne now. I think its considerable charm will hold up over the years, just as TPB’s does for me, and The Wizard of Oz and The Umbrellas of Cherbourg does for others.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    1. You write: I’ve indirectly argued before that India, via Bollywood, has something to tell the rest of the world about love, compassion, caring.

    Mon dieu, what is it that you are smoking these days. We smell some strong Oregon weed.

    Indians are the meanest, most callous, most hypocritical SOBs that ever walked the face of this Earth. The cruelty and misery of life in India for at least 300 million to 400 million is to be seen to be believed.

    Two of the commonest sights on the streets of every town in India when we lived there (most likely things are still the same in that godforsaken dust-bowl) – kids rummaging through stinking garbage for 10+ hours a day to earn the equivalent of $1 or $2/day and young children holding up other younger children in their arms and begging for food and/or money on street corners of most cities.

    Given such misery and hundreds of million who live on the margins of existence in the country, to conceive that Indians can teach others (even if via Bollywood movies) the notion of love or compassion is to engage in reckless fantasies.

    The hallmark trait of the dominant Hindus of the land is brutal exploitation of weaker neighbors and servile boot-licking of stronger neighbors.

    2. On Tujh Mein Rab Dikhta Hai, since we’ve little faith in a higher power this line did not resonate with us as it perhaps did with others. In any case, dialogs are only one element of a fine movie.

    3. You write: To measure the output of one culture by another culture’s yardstick is valid, I guess. But isn’t it at least as valid to use each culture’s own yardstick to measure its own cultural output?

    The blighted land is a wasteland as far as culture.

    4. We haven’t seen The Princess Bride. But we will in the not too distant future.

  33. kenan   June 28, 2009 at 6:35 pm

    i agree with all my heart, hgquinn.

    and you – stop overdoing it.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    You write: you – stop overdoing it

    So, we’re overdoing it?

    If any country is in dire need of a Renaissance (both moral and cultural), it’s India.

    Meanwhile, feast on these stories:

    As Indian Growth Soars, Child Hunger Persists – New York Times

    Hunger in India states ‘alarming’ – BBC

    No convictions in India despite child labour ban – Reuters

    In pictures: India’s child workers – BBC

    100 years of making movies by Indians – 5 Oscars or is that on the higher side?

    Mera Bharat Mahaan.

    BTW, have you seen Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi ?

  34. kenan   June 28, 2009 at 8:41 pm

    yup, I saw it 2 times. And i’m going to watch it again.

    “The hallmark trait of the dominant Hindus of the land is brutal exploitation of weaker neighbors and servile boot-licking of stronger neighbors.”

    Yes, like all the other nations in the world that can afford to or need to do just that.

    And, do you think First world countries with cleaner Human Rights slates better deserve to teach the world about love & compassion?

    I think India’s stories are so much more charming, foolishly optimistic and happy ending(ed) than those from your country. And that these stories come out of a wasteland with 300-400 million of its citizens living in a pitiable state, like you say, make them even more romantic, more significant & more needed.

    An Oscar nominated movie does not necessarily mean good cinema.
    But now i’m wondering how many of India’s Oscar submissions are non-Bollywood.

    If i knew better English like hgquinn, i would argue with you but i don’t, so i’ll just karate chop you and put you in the trash basket. Haiyyyaaaa!

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    1. You write: yup, I saw it 2 times. And i’m going to watch it again.

    God, if you have seen Rab Ne Bana 2 times, you are 2 times more masochistic than we thought.

    There’s nothing in the movie. All fart and no art.

    A low-watermark, even by Bollywood’s lowly standards. A wife not recognizing her husband sans his mustache!

    In an age when there’s talk of identifying people by the distinctive splotches on their derrieres and schlongs, here we have a dolt who can’t identify her Pati-Parameswar because he shaved off his mustache.

    2. You write: I think India’s stories are so much more charming, foolishly optimistic and happy ending(ed) than those from your country

    Unfortunately, they are mere ‘stories’, charming fantasy tales if you will (to speak like Dick ‘torture protects us all’ Cheney).

    3. You write: And that these stories come out of a wasteland with 300-400 million of its citizens living in a pitiable state, like you say, make them even more romantic, more significant & more needed.

    Prithee, poverty is pretty unromantic to the waifs who suffer it, romantic only to well-fed, misguided, poverty tourists looking in from the outside.

    Go pick up a nice movie like Revolutionary Road or Gran Torino.

    Now, if you’ll excuse us, our Domino’s pizza and the Sunday NYT beckon.

  35. kenan   June 28, 2009 at 10:24 pm

    well, lets just agree to me liking Rab ne ‘cos i get it and you not, ‘cos you don’t.

    and i never said they were anything but @ stories.

    Where did i say poverty was romantic? I said the stories were.
    In any case, poverty is rarely, if ever depicted in Indian movies.

    i win, i win, i win!!

    I don’t want to watch Revolutionary Road or Gran Torino.

    Why don’t you watch this while you’re eating your disgusting pizza (i won’t watch those videos as long as i live) & cheer up =D

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XWPAAgedh8w

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    1. You write: i win, i win, i win!!

    Yes, yes, yes. (The best way to keep children quiet is to pretend they’ve won the game.)

    2. The video of Samudra is nice. Guess he/she is 6-9 months-old.

  36. hgquinn   June 29, 2009 at 7:28 am

    Here is how India is tops in terms of caring: in one of the most densely populated countries in the world, with vast differences between people in terms of rights, wealth, water, food and other resources, religion and historical traditions, there is no wholesale internal war or genocide. As imperfect as India is (as imperfect as people are), India accords the right to live to almost all its citizens, and it does it dil se. It really does. OK, to avoid war and genocide, privileged people in India get seriously pissy, bossy, greedy, arrogant, and mean towards others. They make full use of all their humanity, in other words, both positive and negative. But they stop short of general murder most of the time. This is not true in some other countries that are not even as seriously stressed for fair resource distribution as India is. And what was the effect of a few centuries of outside rule by what I consider to be, historically, the coldest culture in the world — the Brits? Isn’t India still recovering from the trauma of that period? PTSD can exaggerate negative character traits as individuals suffering from the aftermath of trauma learn the very hard lesson that it’s OK to trust others, once the trauma has been removed. Some people continue to act the trauma out for a long time, even repeating acts that caused the trauma. I think India as a whole has been in recovery from a massive trauma, and the recovery is doing pretty well, but is still not completely over.

    As for man’s inhumanity to man, when I was in college in NYC, for a class, I had to volunteer at a mental hospital. The case that struck me hardest was a person who was in his 30’s, but was the size of a 3-year-old. He had to be kept in a screened-in crib. He could not walk or talk. Why was he like that? He’d been discovered on a trash heap in a Brooklyn alleyway, starving. He was a few months old when found. He’d been thrown out by his mother. That’s here, in mostly-humane NYC. An exception, true. But what if NYC had a breakdown in distribution of food, water, etc.? Crime and brutality would rise to horrible levels. What has been affecting India for a long time is difficult logistics for getting food and water and other resources from here to there. Btw, I doubt that anyone can match NYC in terms of historical crime family and drug related brutalities, both of which have diminished in recent years due to more evenly-distributed prosperity.

    I watched Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi again last night. SRK’s so-called (even by me, above) overacting is absolutely deliberate. He’s way more an artist than we’ve been giving him credit for recently. If you want me to give you a point (minutes-in) in the movie that will show something that proves my point (I believe), let me know.

    Speaking of Dil Se, very much looking forward to a review of it.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    1. Promise to review Dil Se soon.

    2. You write: there is no wholesale internal war or genocide

    Wholesale war maybe not but since independence India has been wracked by internal strife in some corner of the country or other. Now it’s Maoists in Eastern India, at one time it was the Sikhs in Punjab, before that it was Assam, before that it was Mizoram, Nagaland… Kashmir from the beginning (i.e. since 1947).

    Many of these battles have had elements of genocide. In Kashmir, it was Muslims vs Hindus, in Punjab it was Sikhs vs Hindus, in many of the urban clashes it’s usually Hindus vs Muslims and in the clashes in the villages it’s usually one caste or religion against another.

    3. So if Indians are behaving in an inhumane fashion toward their fellow human beings, it’s all because of the PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder).

    For this novel explanation of the recidivist Indian barbarity, you certainly deserve the Most Interesting Comment of the First Six Months of 2009 Award.

  37. hgquinn   June 29, 2009 at 7:45 am

    Don’t like to see elephants in zoos. The baby looks as if it’s trying to learn to play football — skills and head-butts. Wonder if a ball with some texture on the surface would be better for Samudra. This beach ball slips away. Trunks aren’t designed for large plastic spheres. Was worried that mother and baby don’t get enough exercise, baby seems a bit floppy and mother too still. Found this at the Oregon Zoo’s web site — reassuring:

    “The zoo’s plans call for increasing the size of the current elephant exhibit to six acres; building new barns and state-of-the-art indoor facilities; and acquiring an off-site facility with 200-plus acres of additional land for the elephants. These upgrades will improve living conditions for the zoo’s current herd, Keele said, and allow scientists to continue studying the sustainability of the species.”

    Btw, the Kashmir situation runs to profound overdramatization on both sides. Everyone’s whinging loudly about what the other side has done / is doing, and people sometimes seem to set up situations that cause bad actions to take place, as if people are competing for the award of most victimized, and are going all-out to win it. Meanwhile, most people are living their lives. If anyone was a serious complain, it’s the Hindus who were driven out in ’93 and in earlier times, plus olden-times forced conversions to Islam, etc. As for the Hindu majority rule in India, isn’t it true that the Muslim minority gets benefits from the state due to its minority status? And isn’t it true that, day to day, there’s very little religious-based violence? From the outside, it’s clear that those of Hindu faith and those of Muslim faith in India are essentially the same people. It’s a matter of cousins fighting. And fighting. And fighting. May the dil se approach prevail and bring the cousins together in their rightful blood-based family.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    1. Yes, the pachyderms’ enclosure in the YouTube video does seem to be too small.

    2. You write: isn’t it true that the Muslim minority gets benefits from the state due to its minority status?

    We are not clear what special official benefits Muslims currently get in rest of India as a minority other than that they have their own Personal Law.

    May also vary from state to state.

    We do know that Scheduled Castes/Scheduled Tribes and Backward Castes get preferences in job and college admissions in most states.

    Maybe Indians in India can clarify whether, and to what extent, Muslims get special privileges.

  38. hgquinn   June 29, 2009 at 7:57 am

    At present, India doesn’t know how to promote its entries into the Oscars properly. “Reading” Hindi, Bollywood and other genres of Indian cinema correctly is not an easy thing for those not familiar with India. It takes a while to grasp the theatrical traditions that preceded and inform India’s film traditions, to learn the body language, get the jokes (I had to learn some Hindi for that!) and playfulness, understand the social constraints, etc. The films need an educationally-based kind of promotion, which India doesn’t seem to fully realize as yet.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    Great art transcends language, geography or cultural distinctiveness.

    All of the following movies would have been good in any language and do not require viewers to be aware of the specific cultural contexts:

    Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, The Bicycle Thief, Blame it on Fidel, Tokyo Sonata, Gomorrah, Cidade de Deus, Monsieur Hire, Tell No One,

  39. hgquinn   June 29, 2009 at 3:17 pm

    The most successful Asian films in the west are those that depict fantastical or semi-fantastical worlds, where interior settings, costumes and mannerisms are not directly tied to present times. Most such films are fight and historical drama films from China or Japan, and Japanese anime. (Japanese anime deliberately westernizes itself.)

    If India had started exporting its film culture to the west half a century ago, much of what seems unusual to westerners in Indian films now would not seem that way. This is the process that took place with Chinese and Japanese films. Yet even so, their more realistic films are a hard sell in the west. More realistic Chinese and Japanese films don’t get wide distribution in the west for some of the same reasons that Indian films don’t: too many cultural differences to make sense to mass audiences. But they have one small advantage over Indian films — the western public is at least aware of China’s and Japan’s film-making traditions, via their mass-audience films.

    There are some brilliant films out there from all Asian countries, which simply never get distribution in western theaters. In rare instances, a film will get two weeks in an art house, or one showing at a film society programme. Thank goodness for Netflix, for putting some of these films out there.

    Going back to the need to educate the west about the subcontinent…. I may have shared this here before — if so, I apologize for repeating it: I had to watch Dil Se over and over before I got Amar’s changing attitudes in the train station in the opening scenes, or understood his combined playfulness and relentless pursuit of Meghna, and how easily he acceded to a marriage with Preeti despite being in love with Meghna. Dil Se is like a mini-encyclopedia about what an Indian film — read India’s culture and society as distilled in film, as well as the art of Indian cinema in general — can be about. Shouldn’t this film be very well-known in the west, as much for its exotic culture (from western eyes) as for its art? I think so. But it’s not. Very few films from India are understood by western audiences without previous cultural education. Those that are generally show poverty, prostitution, riots, or anything about Dharamsala. Westerners’ exposure to subcontinental culture comes through the top-notes of what the media puts out, so these unusual aspects of the subcontinent come to seem like what it’s all about.

    Monsoon Wedding and Mira Nair’s other films were important, and Ray’s of course, and even SDM, because they are the advance guard in exposing the west to something they know little about.

    This needs to continue. And the effort should be widened. IMHO, no one in India really really gets how much education of western audiences is needed before Indian films can be properly understood. A long-term investment needs to be made to share what Indian culture and society are about with the west. Festivals, animated shorts for kids, film society programs, and so on, would all help. The interest the west had recently been taking in India and Pakistan is heartening. There’s been a big upswing in NYTimes stories about the subcontinent in the past three years. Almost every week there are pics from Kashmir, Assam, Rajasthan. Four years ago, I’d never heard of Assam or Rajasthan.

    Anyway, will look forward to your future reviews, for any films. Thank you for the award, btw. And a bow to your efforts. There’s no one else out there in the US who has both the passion and the courage to write such strong reviews, at least that I’m aware of. That you write about a film form that I love, that gets scant attention in the US, makes reading your reviews all the more fun.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    Have seen Mira Nair’s Salaam Bombay and Namesake…both were decent.

    We plan to finally watch Double Indemnity (1944) today after postponing it repeatedly.

    Hopefully, we should get Dil Se on Thursday from Netflix.

  40. vsk   July 23, 2009 at 2:16 pm

    I watched RBDJ in the theater with my friend who knows Hindi. I was asking him to explain some of the dialogues as I couldn’t understand them all. After sometime I told him I rather watch the crap and embrace the saying “Ignorance is Bliss”.

    And to top it all, when the credits were rolling, people actually stood up and clapped their hands! WTF!

    Indian cinemas h

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    What happened to your last line?

    Going by the trash churning into cash Bollywood movies, we think the Hindi film audience is a little more swayed by the big stars.

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