Folks, there’s no need for all those effusive thank-yous.
Oh well, if you insist.
You are welcome, ma’am. It was a pleasure, sir.
But today is not the occasion to look backward (as our Kallu Mama Barack Obama is wont to say).
It’s a somber time to reflect on the momentous tasks ahead of us.
Today is a red letter day here for us.
Stop that noise, fellas.
Be patient. What’s the matter with y’all. Yeah, we see you getting antsy.
OK, we’re coming to the point.
Yes, if you’re in that big a hurry for the big news, here it comes.
Bowing to the explicit and implicit desires of our dear readers Supergirl, Asha Tampa, Chaitu1987, Shadowfax_arbit, 13ghosts, Ratnakar, Kelambu_kaathu, Joeantony, Araj, What_if, Inirschennai, Raghavan00, Sganeshkumar1989, Jogibhima and the unvoiced aspirations of thousands of our silent readers, SearchIndia.com today takes the next step in its perilous voyage – our entry into the arena of Tollywood movies.
Dishum. Dishum. Aha, the sound of shots that were heard around the world.
Yes, a small step for SearchIndia.com but a giant leap for Telugus worldwide.
Sure, we understand the Telugu terrain is full of deadly mines, Taliban like Nagarjuna lurk behind every rock and the road is fraught with danger every step of the way.
Fear not, dear readers.
We are well prepared for this dangerous mission.
* You will agree that our not knowing Telugu is a big asset for reviewing Telugu movies.
Notwithstanding what you may have heard or what we may have said in a moment of levity, we can’t follow a word of Telugu (except of course our twin children, Donganakoduka and Champestanu).
* You will agree that not having a legacy of watching Telugu films is actually an asset.
You see, no mainframe or VAX code to replace here.
Names like Mahesh Babu, Chiranjeevi, Siddharth, Ram Charan Teja, Akkineni Naga Chaitanya, Allu Arjun, Venkatesh,
Nagarjuna, NTR sr & jr mean nothing to us.
They might all be different varieties of Hyderabadi Biryani.
We are fans of neither Venkatesh nor of Ram Charan Teja. You can’t find us in the Mahesh Babu camp or the Allu Arjun camp.
We start with a tabula rasa here, guys.
* You will agree that watching all those infernal Hindi and Tamil movies has prepared us for this onerous task ahead.
Kinda like Rocky Balboa practicing for the big bout by fighting with lesser players.
Damsels, like Young Lochinvar, here we come on our steed:
So faithful in love, and so dauntless in war,
There never was knight like the young Lochinvar.
SearchIndia.com’s advent into Tollywood commences with our review of new Telugu movie Ganesh, featuring Ram, Kajal Agarwal and directed by Saravanan.
Don’t Say We Didn’t Warn Ya
Ladies and Gentlemen, SearchIndia.com’s flight to Tollywood will shortly depart from Runway Lunacy.
Tis’ time to fasten your seat-belt folks.
Please switch off any intelligence you may have unwittingly brought on board.
We promise the trans-continental flight ahead will be extremely bumpy.
SearchIndia.com’s air-traffic controllers are predicting heavy air-turbulence with a lot of flatulence.
Have your life-jackets and O2 masks handy for the flatulent oops turbulent times ahead.
Please do not hesitate to leave your valuable comments so that our Tollywood journey together will be a trip to remember in the autumn years of your life.
Desa Bhashalandu Telugu Lessa (Telugu is the sweetest of languages). 😉
Sound of loud applause for five minutes.
Thank you for the applause.
The Rest is History.
I am a monster who belongs to a reality which does not exist yet. Ah, but it does exist, it will exist, I am sure of it. – Henry Miller, Tropic of Capricorn P.225