Himmatwala Crucified

If Himmatwala 1983 had any virtues, it was the wanton display of Sridevi’s ‘thunder thighs’ to a nation of drooling idiots. Alas, Himmatwala 2013 lacks even that ‘merit’ given that Tamannaah Bhatia is rather effete in the thighs department. The reviews are starting to come in for Sajid Khan’s Himmatwala remake and they’re crucifying the […]

Himmatwala 1983 – Endless Nonsense

Like most odious Bollywood films, Himmatwala (1983) has its origins in South India, or what North Indians mischievously refer to as gaand Bharat. In 1981, a South Indian director with the unpronounceable appellation of Kovelamudi Raghavendra Rao cobbled up a plain awful movie in the Telugu language called Ooriki Monagadu starring Krishna and Jayaprada (who won notoriety […]

Bol Bachchan – Absurdity’s New Last Name

By Naveen Being one who’s cognizant of the supremely low standards of Bollywood and the limited acting skills of its favorite star child Abhishek Bachchan, I should have thought thrice before walking into the cinemas after a few weeks of sabbatical to watch the perilously inane Bol Bachchan. Bol Bachchan is the latest turd-pile from […]

Tezz Trash is Disaster at Box Office

The Ajay Devgn-Anil Kapoor piece of trash Tezz is a disaster at the U.S. box office. As you can see in the below table, the Tezz junk is one of the worst Bollywood performers at the U.S. box office in recent years. For the April 27-29, 2012 opening weekend Tezz grossed a pitifully low $148,133 […]

Tezz Review – Usual Boring Indian Garbage

When Indian filmmakers like Priyadarshan are not pissing out mindless comedies, they’re pimping out nonsensical ‘action’ outrages like Tezz that are loosely based on decades-old foreign films (the 1975 Japanese film Bullet Train, in this instance). Tezz made us want to yelp in agony – Do one thing for me, Sredni Vashtar. Bet you schmucks […]