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Nov 272009
 




Critics Show Middle Finger to Arya 2

A pack of rabid curs descend upon a poor, helpless woman in the last trimester of her pregnancy and drag her into a dark alley on a moonless night.

The frothing whackos then shove a rusted hanger up the victim’s twat.

Folks, the resulting ugly, bloody, horrific aborted mess on the floor is Arya 2.

The hapless woman in extremis is the paying audience and the pack of rabid whackos sure do answer to the roll-call of Allu Arjun, Kajal Agarwal, Navdeep, Sukumar et al.

Sheer Torture
If you thought Arya was awful, its successor Arya 2, unleashed by a confederacy of dunces, is an apocalyptic nightmare of biblical proportions.

Handicapped by a bizarrely asinine story, infested with a gaggle of buffoons and endowed with an entertainment quotient of Minus Infinity, Arya 2 plunges the knife into the guts of the unsuspecting audience, repeatedly twists the knife scooping up their entrails, one long, painful intestinal strand at a time.

And the central villain of this hideous monstrosity is none other than the anencephalic director Sukumar, the accursed architect of the original and misbegotten Arya too.

Besides committing the horrible, inexpatiable crime of misdirecting this movie, the fatuous clown also lays claims to penning this drivel of a story.

Ha ha ha, if the poppycock we witnessed on the screen is a story, then we are Krishnadevarayudu!

In its quintessence, Arya 2 is the too-lengthy account of a devoted friend Arya (Allu Arjun), who’d do anything, yes anything, to help his rich friend Ajay (Navdeep).

No sacrifice (a refrain throughout the movie) is too big for Arya if it’ll bring a smile on his undeserving friend’s face. A trait he’s held on to from their days together in an orphanage many summers ago.

Deja Vu
Yes, schmucks for once y’all guessed right.

Arya 2 is Arya redux.

In this love triangle a la the original Arya even Geetha (Kajal Agarwal), Arya’s inamorata is handed over to that ingrate Ajay.

That’s not all.

Our psychotic hero Arya also maintains a diary into which go such gems as pilligaddam-vadu prapancham chudakudadu, gundugadi-gundu karigipovali et al and on occasion even sweet-talks a faction of Rayalaseema thugs to renounce their sickles.

Ugh.

As if the aforesaid infernal garbage isn’t enough to drive you batty, in between you have that insufferable Brahmanandam mumbling ad nauseum about hallucinations, his iPhone, 9th floor and just irritating the bejezus out of paying viewers.

What did ya say? Ah, you want to know about Navdeep. All we can say is some zoo in Andhra Pradesh is missing one chimp.

O God in Heaven, what sin have we committed that in our twilight years our tired old eyes must behold that atrocious fight scene in the bus with two ambulances following.

Acme of nonsense, we tell ya.

Stylish Star, My Foot
Except for some dancing skills, Allu Arjun offers nothing.

Jeero, as the mispronouncing Telugus are wont to say.

The small-built fella looks clownish when dispatching off an army of ruffians.

The pygmy acts like a retard when he’s wooing the girl.

The Lilliput behaves like an escapee from the local circus when he’s sweet-talking his father-in-law Raja Reddy or his girl’s prospective father-in-law Kasi Reddy.

Kajal Agarwal – Kiss of Death
A hopelessly incompetent, worthless actress, Kajal Agarwal is the dregs of the dregs, the lees of the lees.

In scene after scene after scene – in the opening days at her new job, in the bus after her kidnappng, in the train with Allu Arjun, when she howls like a banshee after Arya is knifed by her father, in the hospital – Kajal Agarwal turned out to be the kiss of death for the movie.

By the way, will some charitable soul please, please obtain this man-chester a decent pair of tits?

If we’ve to watch any more of this Visha-Kanya’s movies in future, the knockers would at least be some consolation.

Music – Baga Ordinary
Except for the charmer Karige Loga song, none of the other numbers (with their liberal use of English words) made any impact.

Sheer cacophony.

Neither did the picturization of any of the songs send us into an ecstatic fit.

Blood on the Floor
The audience at a theater on the East Coast was not engaged with the movie.

People were frequently moving out, chattering or playing with their cellphones. Our neighbors to the left walked out before the end.

As we were leaving the hall, we overheard nothing but imprecations for this junk. The girl behind us was muttering to her pals, daridranga undi (horrible).

Earlier, during the interval we heard a guy whining, dance bagundi, cinema gabbu. Director kampu chesadu (dance is good, cinema is lousy. The director has screwed it up).

Ultimately, Arya 2 turns out to be a mortal combat between the rabid canine pack makers and cast of this film and the good guys i.e the audience. Alas, the viewers are felled by the rabid beasts.

Guys, unless you are the sort whose joie de vivre lies in wallowing in the detritus of a bloody abortion, do not even consider seeing this dystopian nightmare a.k.a. Arya 2.

Show Arya 2 the middle finger. This sick shit deserves no less.

We want our $12 back. :(

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Critics Show Middle Finger to Arya 2

  25 Responses to “Arya 2 Review – A Back-Alley Abortion”

  1. [Link to a review on a different web site deleted]

    What are your comments about directors intelligence and parallel thinking as specified in the above review? I didn’t see Arya 2 but I liked Arya 1′s screenplay and director’s skills (Most of us were not able to guess what will happen in the next scene and also logic given in dialouges seems intelligent).

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    You write: What are your comments about directors intelligence and parallel thinking as specified in the above review?

    Directors intelligence and parallel thinking?

    Ha ha ha.

    Is that an April Fool prank or what. ;)

    Intelligence and Sukumar (the director) are antipodes.

    The five justifications used in your link to support the director’s intelligence and parallel thinking appear silly in the movie and make no impact whatsoever.

  2. at SI: “what sin have we committed that in our twilight years our tired old eyes must behold that atrocious fight scene in the bus with two ambulances following”.

    So, you are a old man. I see. ;)

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    Could it not be the twilight years of our youth? ;)

  3. I thought Arya 2 will be good :( My friend was keen on watching it.

    Btw did you see this. Sounds interesting but sure its not gonna release over there…
    http://cinefolks.com/tamil/News/news/Re-censor+once+again+for+Renigunta/

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    1. No, we were unaware of Renigunta (the movie)..only the train station. Unlikely, it’ll make it here but you never know.

    2. BTW, what’s the next Tamil movie?

    Villupuram, Katpadi, Arkonam, Warangal, Vijayawada? All equally busy train stations, na? ;)

  4. @Twig – It’s SI’s weird sense of humor. Cardinal rule of the SI blog – “Do not, under any circumstances, believe whatever SI says about himself/herself/themselves/it.”

    I hope I covered all the important points, SI? ;)

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    SI is an illusion. Just rub your eyes and you’ll be alright. ;)

    So what are your thoughts on Arya 2. Has Allu Arjun taken Andhra by storm again?

  5. anna neekadaina telugu cinemalu nachinaya annitlo naa $12 ani adustunnav. oorike cinemalu chudam manay. lekapote balakrishna cinemalu choodu mastuntay

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    Arey chinna-Tammudu, mee trashu English lo rayi babu..idhi Telugu blogu kadhu (could you please scribble your trash in English in future). ;)

    Maa favorite Balakrishna scene chudandi, Jai Chenna Keshava. ;)

  6. Great review dude!..I am still laughing :) ..

    I saw the movie too..was a complete disappointment.

    Do u write reviews for other movies too???..Would love to read them :)

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    You write: Do u write reviews for other movies too???

    Our repertoire extends only to Hindi, Tamil, Telugu, English, Kannada and a handful of French, German, Italian, Chinese, Spanish and Hungarian movies. ;)

  7. hey cheppu kosthana kadhu simple chemmanthi akkudu ok

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    What language is that – Mongolian, Uzbek or perhaps Ukrainian ?

  8. why u linking me to Ukraine all the time?

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    Sheer coincidence.

    If Ukraine is anathema to you, how about Chilakaluripet. ;)

  9. You are one of the few guys, who do not give rating to a particular movie after the review. Are you aversed to the rating system ?

    Also, Balakrishna, Vijayakanth movies are the best examples of human stupidity. But I’m damn sure one can ‘enjoy’ those movies albeit in a different way.

    How do you review those kind of movies? Will you recommend watching them?

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    1. You write: You are one of the few guys, who do not give rating to a particular movie after the review. Are you aversed to the rating system ?

    When we target the SI blog to simians, we’ll embrace the rating system.

    Are people so stupid they need stars to understand whether a movie is good or bad.

    2. You write: Also, Balakrishna, Vijayakanth movies are the best examples of human stupidity.

    Hardly. Humans are stupid most of the time. Just look around you.

    3. Balakrishna? Haven’t seen any of its movies.

    Vijayakant? May have seen one or two of its films but can’t remember them offhand.

  10. Nice review. Unbiased and truthful.

    Thank you.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    ;)

    How is Arya 2 faring in Andhra Pradesh?

  11. Kicking up a storm, as expected. Everyone I know who’s watched it is is all praise.

    Dunno, personally, I dont wanna take the trouble of watching it in a theatre. Will wait for it to be aired on tv.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    We never cease to be amazed by the demand for all kinds of waste in India.

  12. btw… Are you on google reader? Am not too sure how it works, I only recently started using it, and its one cool app!

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    No…we just discovered Bookmarks. ;)

  13. On an kind of related note, you mentioned that you have not seen any Balakrishna movies. Here’s one “super-action” scene of Balayya, if this does not make you watch his films, I would say you are saved from the agony :)

    http://www.metacafe.com/watch/1387701/balakrishna_mi2/

    Cheers! Have you guys thought of putting a list of Top 10 Worst movies of the 2009 you’ve watched? (List might be too long).

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    1. Was the squealing rabbit in the video Balakrishna? ;)

    2. You write: Have you guys thought of putting a list of Top 10 Worst movies of the 2009 you’ve watched?

    Hard task because most desi films qualify to be in the Top 10 worst movies.

  14. What are the other movies you are planning to review?

    Boring..!

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    Working on Kandukondein. Really.

    The black dog had us by the throat. But we managed to free ourselves from its sharp incisors.

  15. Ha ha ha, nice review.

    Donno how you choose to go from thrashing Tamil films and then Telugu. You should have chosen to watch Malayalam films instead. Atleast you may have found some good movies.

    By the way, can you review this Hollywood Film called THE CORE. I am recommending this film due to some special reasons ;) Try watching it. I am sure its available on Netflix. Let’s see your take on it. :D

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    1. You write: You should have chosen to watch Malayalam films instead

    Few Malayalam movies release here.

    2. Yes, Netflix has The Core. Will watch and review in a few weeks.

  16. The Core is crap. They go into the core of the earth in a ‘spaceship’… Saw it when I was a kid. Liked it a lot back then..

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    One man’s crap is another’s favorite (for wateva reason).

  17. Nice tweak: Man-chester :-)

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    She is. She is.

    At least, for now. ;)

    What ‘peaks’ the morrow brings, who knows. ;)

  18. Btw, Namitha’s will do for you? ;-)

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    Oh, no.

    Any day, we’ll take the carpenter’s delight over that cow.

  19. I can safely show the MIDDLE finger to this REVIEW.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    Hey, we just published this new post:

    Critics Show Middle Finger to Arya 2

    Enjoy. ;)

  20. @shadowfax_arbit: LOL, that movie was not only crap, it was an abomination. I recommended it to SI so that it can tear its head to shreds on the review.

    To put it simply: Out of the movies with the most scientific inaccuracies, the CORE was voted the WORST MOVIE of the Century, by SCIENTISTS.

    This film carries the unique distinction of not only being bashed by Critics, but also by Scientists.

    Way to go, shadowfax_arbit, you spoiled the fun now. Happy :D

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    Aha.

    After the Agneepath recommendation, we should have guessed. :(

  21. @Aswin: Oh man I spoilt the fun. Never again, I swear :)

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    In future, we’ll double-check everything that flows from Ashwin’s pen/keyboard.

  22. SI Wrote:
    Aha.

    After the Agneepath recommendation, we should have guessed. :(

    Aswin Kini says: Recommending Agneepath was a horrible mistake. By the way, I also recommended a lot of others movies:

    1) Shutter (Thai Horror Film, not the Hollywood version)
    2) Evano Oruvan(Madhavan’s film)

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    We’ll get to your other recommendations soon.

    We promise. :)

  23. SI Wrote:
    In future, we’ll double-check everything that flows from Ashwin’s pen/keyboard.

    Aswin says:
    Thank you sire!
    I don’t think I am gonna play more pranks on you like that!
    Kindly try to review Evano Oruvan.
    I hope it is in your Netflix queue!

    FYI, this ain’t no prank. Read this link:
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Evano_Oruvan

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    Evano Oruvan
    has yet to make it to Netflix but Shutter is currently available (even in Instant Play). So will watch it soon.

  24. i liked the movie ….first half was crazy ….second half was a bit tedious ….nevertheless the movie on the whole was good . Songs were good ….Allu Arjun dances well and overacts like there is no tomm ….but i guess that’s his trademark now ….

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    1. You write: first half was crazy ….second half was a bit tedious ….nevertheless the movie on the whole was good

    How can Arya 2 possibly be good if the first half was crazy and the second half tedious?

    Beats us.

    Or is it Kingfisher talking? ;)

    2. True, Allu Arjun is a decent dancer.

    But the story and acting are beyond ridiculous.

  25. Hey Krishnadevarayudu, this was a good movie, not Allus best but the second half was very entertaining and amusing.

    Now time for Trisha and Gopichand.