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Machchi, kuppae da, kuppaeswamy padam idhu (hey buddy, this movie is trash).

A wretched melange of an asinine story, shoddy acting and mediocre music, Kanthaswamy is a mind-numbing piece of trash that left us shell-shocked and reeling in horror at the infernal nonsense unfolding on the screen.

Folks, at three hours this garbage is exactly three hours too long.

Susi Ganesan, the arch villain of Kanthaswamy, is a dilettante, a rank amateur and a danda-soru (wastrel) out to rip you off your money and time.

How this tyro (guilty of the crimes of non-story, non-screenplay and mis-direction) got to don the director’s crown is, to use a Churchillian expression, a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma.

Is Kollywood so starved of talent that they’d stoop so low as to settle for dregs and schmucks like Susi Ganesan? Sad.

To think these clowns behind Kanthaswamy flew to Mexico and other parts of the world to film this embarrassment is an astonishing act of chutzpah.

Why Vikram, Why?
Whatever possessed Kollywood star Vikram of Anniyan fame to feature in this horrid movie is a mystery we’d like to unlock.

Alas, the Vikram in the bizzare Batmanesque costume we encounter on the screen is not the brilliant Ambi/Anniyan of Anniyan fame but the sick Vikram of the Bheema infamy.

There’s no fire in this Vikram fella anymore.

Whether he’s fighting the baddies, romancing the girl or delivering righteous spiels on helping the poor, Vikram impresses not one whit.

Not for a second do we get a convincing portrayal by Vikram.

Au contraire, he looks silly most of the time (kinda like Vijay in Villu or Ajith in Aegan).

Crapulent Story
Kanthaswamy (Vikram), the eponymous hero of the movie, is cast in the role of a Robin Hood cop who takes from crooks like PPP (Ashish Vidyarti) and renders to the needy and poor.

And how do you think the poor send out desperate pleas for help to Kanthaswamy – by affixing letters to a tree at a Murugan temple!

But the Robin Hood aspect of the movie is so crudely handled and so implausible that it beggars belief. Continue reading »

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Should a gaggle of rustic ambattans (barbers) suddenly decide to forsake their razors for the camera, the end result would be infinitely better than this grotesque abomination called Thoranai.

Save the unsavory feat of shaving a few unwary souls of their money and time, Thoranai’s sole claim to fame is that the crappy movie marks a new low from the augean stables of GK Film Corporation.

Devoid of any entertainment, bereft of anything resembling music and wholly lacking in quality, Thoranai is the the latest Kollywood synonym for garbage.

There were all of a dozen people for the 3:15PM show of Thoranai at Movie City in Edison, New Jersey on a Saturday.

Perhaps, the news had already spread fast even to this corner of the world that this is one trashy movie to steer clear of.

No Redeeming Elements
Ask not what’s wrong with Thoranai. Ask if there’s anything right at all with this dungheap of a movie.

An asinine story that tests the patience of viewers, bizarre stunt scenes that mock the laws of physics, dancing that ridicules the notion of grace and sophomoric comedy that plumb the depths of trash, Thoranai is a mind-numbing horror show. No more and certainly no less. Continue reading »

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American moviegoers emptied their overflowing bedpans over the head of ugly Bollywood and Kollywood actress Shriya Saran.

A mediocre and unpretty actress, Shriya Saran will find it very hard to live down the humiliating rebuff from U.S. moviegoers to her Hollywood misadventure The Other End of the Line.

Shriya’s ghastly English movie not only opened to scathing reviews but was also a total disaster at the U.S. box office in its opening weekend (October 31-November 2, 2008).

For the opening weekend, The Other End of the Line had a gross of just $59,078 in the U.S., a beyond pathetic box office response for a new movie.

The crappy movie had an average of $649, perhaps the lowest we have seen for an Indian movie in the U.S.

Shriya Saran’s embarrassment of a movie opened at No-44 at the U.S. box office.

Take a look (below table) at how The Other End of the Line fared vis-a-vis a few other Indian movies:

In its review of The Other End of the Line, Continue reading »

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Is Shriya Saran the only ambalai (male), the only star with cojones, in the Tamil film industry.

Under the guise of protesting the attacks against Tamils in Sri Lanka, the vekkaketta (shameless) members of the Tamil film industry has stooped so low as to tacitly kiss the derriere of the terrorist organization LTTE, the killers of former Indian Prime Minister Rajiv Gandhi.

Today, November 1, the Tamil film stars even organized an eight-hour Unnavrutham (hunger strike) in Chennai supposedly to signal their support for Sri Lankan Tamils.

Strangely, all this recent outrage against the attacks on Tamils in Sri Lanka and the demand for a ceasefire is happening when the LTTE is struggling in the face of a strong onslaught from Sri Lanka’s armed forces.

For sure, the Tamil film stars will protest that Tamils in Tamil Nadu are only supporting the Sri Lankan Tamils and not the LTTE.

But as we said a few weeks ago:

[I]n our view that distinction does not exist. Without financial support from Tamil Nadu and the Tamil diaspora, the LTTE would probably collapse in a few weeks.

Why are the spineless Tamil film stars not Continue reading »

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