Snitch Review – Nice Dope, Bro

America must be the dumbest mothafucking country this side of the Atlantic and, surely, that side of the Pacific.

You disagree with me, punk?

OK, dickhead explain to me why, after spending over 1,000 million dollars, imprisoning a gazillion people and losing hundreds of thousands of lives, we still ain’t no closer to winning this fucking Jihad ‘gainst Marijuana, Cocaine, Heroin, Crack, Meth, Ecstasy and all the other exotic shit hitting our streets today than we were four decades back!

Cat got your tongue, bro?

A Snitch’s Story

All we got for a trillion dollars going down the rabbit hole is one jailbird snitching against another in the ears of ambitious, arrogant, power-drunk prosecutors in desperate hopes of reducing his prison term.

And that’s what Snitch is all about, baby.

Ratting out the other guy for some favors from the prosecutor.

Only this time, there’s some minor twists in da Hollywood tale directed by a no-name fella called Ric Roman Waugh and featuring B-list star Dwyane Johnson, Jon Bernthal, Susan Sarandon, Michael Kenneth Williams and other nonentities.

I suppose Sarandon is the only name that’ll ring a bell to all ye Chutiyas.

Construction company owner John Matthew (Dwayne Johnson) is leading the good, pimpin’ life.

Business is looking good, he’s buying more big trucks, the man’s got a sexy bomb (Nadine Velazquez) for a wife, a young daughter to dote on and a McMansion to call home.

Then there’s his first wife Sylvie and teenage son Jason living in a small house.

Ha ha, John’s life comes crashing down at a barbecue party when Jason is arrested on drug charges and the prosecutor tells him the kid is facing 10-years under mandatory sentencing laws after his buddy snitches on him.

Now John does the good, loving father act, anything to get my son out of jail, for the rest of the movie.

Only instead of Jason, John dons the role of a snitch in a deal with the ambitious and cold Federal prosecutor Joanne Keeghan (Susan Sarandon) to save his son.

But this snitch is playing with big sharks in a big-stakes, deadly game.

Not Oscar Material but Good

Written by Justin Haythe and Ric Roman Waugh, the story is a smooth ride with the emotional and the drug/action angles neatly intertwined.

The drug peddlers, both small (Black) and big (Mexican), are credible.

Black peddlers are mean-looking, violent street thugs with small guns, easily out menaced by the cold-blooded Mexican butchers with their heavy artillery and bigger operations.

The camerawork is neat and acting more than acceptable.

For action junkies sitting on the edge of their seats and sniffing for an adrenaline rush, there’s a nice piece of high-speed, highway chase in the big hulking truck driven by John with the angry Mexicans in furious pursuit.

Nobody’s gonna remember Snitch six months from now but, hey, that’s a lot better than da usual Bollywood drivel, which I forget before even hitting the parking lot.

This weekend, when the only alternative is some Indian shit called Kai Po Che, I ain’t asking nothing more than Snitch.

Overall, found Snitch to be a decent movie.

Go for it, kid. Snitch is playing in theatres across Amreeka.

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