2 Guns Review – Shitty Shitty Bang Bang

God, the junk some directors and actors shovel out just to pocket a few extra dollars!

Who’d have thought a movie featuring Hollywood A-listers Denzel Washington and Mark Wahlberg would be so crapulent!

If I weren’t under the obligation of delivering this review, I’d have stomped off in disgust 30-minutes into the movie.


Directed by an Icelandic halfwit filmmaker named Baltasar Kormákur based on yet another asinine comic book story, 2 Guns is all bang-bang-bang affair interspersed with infantile banter between the lead characters.

If I had my way, I’d ban all comic books since they’re fodder for so many crappy Hollywood movies these days. Iron Man, Superman, Thor, 2 Guns, oh, the insanity seems endless.

A senselessly violent gallimaufry of bank robbers, undercover Drug Enforcement Administration and U.S. Navy agents, CIA operatives and Mexican drug gangs going bang! bang! bang incessantly in a half-baked, incoherent story sums up 2 Guns.

Denzel Washington and Mark Wahlberg play two bank robbers and undercover agents shooting at all and sundry, including occasionally even at each other, in this $60 million project.

But a bullet’s got to have some meaning when it ejects from a gun, otherwise it’s a bullet wasted!


The action scenes, including the charging bull, were mostly of the unimaginative kind.

But for the presence of Washington and Wahlberg, 2 Guns would have been a 99-cent straight-to-DVD film gathering dust in the huge bins at Walmart.

Good Crowd

The movie drew a good response (85%-90% full) at a theatre on the East Coast earlier today.

Several people sitting near me seemed to enjoy the film.

As I always say, some people will appreciate anything, laugh at everything and undiscerningly applaud everything.

Not me!

Beat your meat, mow the lawn, watch DDLJ for the 20th time, clean the attic, get your eyebrows trimmed, do anything but steer clear of this bucketful of manure called 2 Guns.

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