What’s in Your Bra – Formaldehyde?

So stupid you thought formaldehyde was used only to preserve dead frogs or embalm grandma’s dead body before the burial.

Think again.

A lawsuit has been filed against sexy lingerie company Victoria’s Secret in the U.S. alleging that the firm uses formaldehyde in its bras.

Yes, formaldehyde in the bras. No kidding.

Formaldehyde in Your Victoria’s Secret Bras?

Apparently, the alleged use of formaldehyde in the bras is causing rashes, hives and even permanent scarring.

You ask where? Where else, duffer.

Oh, by the way formaldehyde is known to cause cancer too.

Ohio resident Roberta Ritter, supposedly a longtime Victoria’s Secret shopper and the person behind the lawsuit, told ABC News:

I had the welts … very red, hot to the touch, extremely inflamed, blistery. It itched profusely.

I couldn’t sleep, waking up itching.

I was just utterly sick.

I was floored. I thought, ‘I have to come out with this. The can of worms has to be opened because it’s not just me, it’s other people as well.

Oh, how sad.

Of all the place, rashes on the tits. Why couldn’t it be on the heart or lungs?

JFK was right. Life is unfair.

In case you are one of those obscene, curious types, the allegedly offending bras are Angels Secret Embrace and Very Sexy Extreme Me Push-Up bras.

If you live in the U.S., it’s hard for you to have missed Victoria’s Secret lingerie in malls, ads or catalogs even if you don’t happen to wear them. They are so priapically sexxxy. 

No Cialis or Viagra needed with those Victoria’s Secret things on.

Honey, next time your boyfriend (or maybe a girlfriend in your case) complains that your cupcakes smell funny, don’t get insulted.

Maybe, those mammas have been pickling away in formaldehyde.

This is the statement that Victoria’s Secret has put out to the media:

We are sorry that a small number of people have had an issue and we want to help them determine the cause. Customer safety and satisfaction are always our primary concerns and we take seriously any issues our customers may have with our products.

We Can Help
Hey you formaldehydrated victims, if there’s anything we can do to bring relief to your jugs, please, please don’t hesitate to ask us.

Remember Adam Sandler massaging the beautiful Jessica Beil’s yummelicious boobies in I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry?

Well, we have nice, big palms too and we know our way around them tatas.

4 Responses to "What’s in Your Bra – Formaldehyde?"

  1. ★TRΞY☆   November 12, 2008 at 11:35 pm

    Well, we have nice, big palms too and we know our way around them tatas.

    you perverts!

    the christmas VS catalogue is awesome! Make sure you have your DVR turned on for Dec 3.

    Adriana Lima is stunnnnning.. and is a virgin! :O

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    You write above: Adriana Lima is stunnnnning.. and is a virgin!

    Maybe, but not our type.

  2. shuaib68   November 13, 2008 at 8:02 am

    Hey, I have an idea!

    Let’s give some of these to the Mallu boob show artists. SHAKEELA!!! where are you.

    After the infection they’ll stop doing their lousy B****y boob shows. We don’t have to face those Hippos again.

  3. ★TRΞY☆   November 13, 2008 at 9:42 am

    Inspired by Mahendiran’s spamming:
    I have 4 2008 Christmas VS catalogs. Please call me at XXX and have 20$ ready. If you want my DNA on it, it will be an additional 1000$.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    Indians are probably searching for a 2009 Diwali KS catalog by now.

  4. ★TRΞY☆   November 13, 2008 at 10:14 am

    ah.. I didn’t know such a thing existed.. how much is it.. I’ll pay an additional 1000$ if nobody’s DNA is on it.

    Does that 212 number exist.. I have seen it in movies, so I thought it was fake.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    You write above: : ah.. I didn’t know such a thing existed.. how much is it..

    We are sure some enterprising desi is working on 2009 Diwali KS Catalog/Calendar and will peddle it as Made by USA (Ullasnagar Sindhi Association or something like that)

    As for the 212 number, we just wanted to be on the safer side after reading reports of telephone numbers featuring in movies being used to harass the real owners of the number.

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