Red Wine, Puliodharai & Vegetable Shami Kebab

In the interest of the longevity of this blog, our own longevity on this planet and the longevity of your own entertainment, we suddenly decided a short while ago to jump on the Red Wine bandwagon.

As all but the schmucks know by now, Red Wine is considered to be good for the heart (don’t ask us if this is really true or just a devious ploy on the part of the vinters to boost sales).

So, we made haste to the neighborhood Gujju liquor store and like a true desi asked our khem-cho Patel bhai for the Red Wine on sale (you know, cheapest stuff).

At first, Patel worker, cousin of the Patel owner, directed us to this Red Wine and that Red Wine before his fingers finally rested on the Jacob’s Creek Shiraz Cabernet Vintage 2005 ($9.99).

Why the Australian Jacob’s Creek Shiraz Cabernet Vintage 2005 we have no clue.

Maybe, we looked like suckers because we subsequently found the same Red Wine cheaper elsewhere on the net. Man, these Gujjus make the Sindhis look like generous Karnas.

Perhaps, not accustomed to cheapo desis walking into his liquor store our Patel bhai was more interested in talking to us than in selling to to us. First, he asked us whether we lived in the neighborhood.

Upon being answered in the affirmative, our late 20-ish, early 30-ish Patel then proceeded to query us in a conspiratorial tone whether we eat Chicken, Lamb et al.

What the f**k is wrong with these bloodthirsty kinsmen of Narendra Modi in Gandhi’s land!

We declared in the gruffest tone we could muster that nothing that swims, flies or crawls was safe from the long reach of our predatory appetite.

The young Patel lad then hinted to us that he and four of his friends regularly engage in meaty revelry (sounds most un-Gandhian for a Gujju, na?) and would welcome the addition of another desi.

Wary of our Gujju’s intentions but out of politeness’ sake, we quickly exchanged phone numbers and rushed home.

Yeah, rushed home to the Puliyodharai (a.k.a Pulihora in Andhra Pradesh and Puliyogre in Karnataka), Veggie Shami Kebab with lime juice draped minced onions on the side and the $9.99 Australian Cabernet Jacob’s Creek Shiraz Cabernet Vintage 2005 in the brown bag in our hand.

While yours truly is no stranger to wine, this was the first time our wine and Puliyodharai shared a table.

Oh boy, they hit it off fast and soon became fast friends.

Such thick friends that barely a millisecond passed before they followed each other for their eventual rendevouz in the cavernous black hole of our mouth.

We wouldn’t describe the Jacob’s Creek Shiraz Cabernet Vintage 2005 as sweet but light and smooth with a slight hint of a peppery flavor.

Before the Puliyodharai vanished from our plate, our Shiraz vanished from our goblet. And vice versa.

We filled the goblet upto the brim again. Did we say, again and again?

Intent on proving that variety is indeed the spice of life, we bid adieu to the Puliyodharai and alternated a sip of the wine with a bite into our $2.99 Veggie Shami Kebab (from Veggie Delites and marketed by DFI USA Inc, Plainsboro, NJ) siiting smugly amidst diced onions glistening with lime juice.

To tell you a secret, these American onions just don’t have the spirit like our desi Pyaas (onion).

Anyway, by now we were Mahesh Yoging a.k.a. levitating.

Truth be said, we are still trying to prove that Mahesh Yogi ranks higher than Isaac Newton in the pantheon of Physics.

Heck, we are no believers in any of those charlatans that go by different appellations like Krishna, Jesus or Allah.

But after two or three or four glases of wine (who’s counting), four or five kebabs, too many onion slices to keep track of and a plate or plates of spicy Puliyodharai, we were ready to pay obeisance even to the busty Kollywood Goddess Namitha, on the 36D-altar (??) of whose shrine legions of Tamil youths make daily priapic Salaams.

Say what you will but only such a Azhagiya Tamil Magal could put together a delightful trifecta of Red Wine, Puliyodharai and Kebabs for our enjoyment:

Nee Marilyn Monroe…
One Day Mattum Girl Friend Aga Variya….
Saturday Night Party-ku Pogalam Variya
Varen. Varen. Varen.

or is it
Varan. Varan. Varan.

8 Responses to "Red Wine, Puliodharai & Vegetable Shami Kebab"

  1. ShikhariShambhu   June 13, 2009 at 11:26 pm

    i made coconut rice & creme brulee today..

    what’s varen & varan? Responds:

    1. Ah, love creme brulee. Salivating.

    2. You write: what’s varen & varan?

    Both are Tamil words.

    Varen – I’m coming…no, not in the way you think 😉

    Varan – He’s coming

  2. Aswin_Kini   June 14, 2009 at 3:45 am

    Got your point, if you have Veg Kababs + Puliyodharai + Red Wine, then you lose your senses too much that even a 5 foot 9 human elephant called Namitha becomes a Kollywood Goddesses!!! 😉 Very interesting fact!!!

    Maybe I should try that red wine and see a Vijay film. Maybe, I can find the true reasons behind producers paying him crores to deliver thrash of the highest quality (What an oxymoron!!!) 😀 Responds:

    So you think Bachchus is speaking not SI.

    So you think Tamil movie producers are fools.

    So you think Namitha is not a Kollywood Goddess.

    Here, read this excerpt from Yahoo News:

    A temple for popular South Indian actress Namitha is being constructed in Tirunelveli district, 600 km from here, but she is not so enamoured of the shrine.

    ‘I am both thrilled and scared because I find a temple built in honour of a living person – especially me – a little difficult to come to terms with,’ said Namitha who gave hits like ‘Engal Anna’ and ‘Arjuna Arjuna’ in Tamil.

    Sources close to the actress said Namitha was nonplussed when her fan club was reported to have demanded money for the construction of the temple.

    ‘The initial works are completed. Soon, the stone icon of Namitha will be installed and proper consecration performed,’ said S. Selvam, secretary of her fan club.

    Idhu eppadi irukku (how do you react now)?

  3. naseer   June 14, 2009 at 7:32 am

    wine makes u vain.
    avoid alcahol Responds:


    Enna Reservation quota-va (did you complete your schooling through affirmative action programs that let lesser-qualified students in)?

  4. a4apple   June 14, 2009 at 8:05 am

    Hey SI,

    Wine like any other alcoholic drinks has too many myths attached to it and the one that ties heart attack diminishing factor and red wine should be one among them.

    1. As you would know the golden rule of wine is red wine (un chilled always) goes well with red meat and white wine (chilled always) goes well with white meat and sea food.

    2. Jacob’s Creek is a fairly good Australian wine. My favorite is Four Sisters. I used to work in Australian wineries. The truth is there are heaps and heaps (the whole bloody Australia is a vineyard) of vineyards and breweries like Jacob’s creek and Four sisters buy grapes from different parts of Australia. The best lesson in wine drinking – unless you are really good at tasting wine (I don’t think either of us are really good at it, because if we were – we would be sitting in Paris on a high paid job as wine tester making more money than those Wall street bankers); so if you are not good at tasting and telling the difference of various wines then stick on to medium prized wines. In Australia I never spend more than 8 dollars on a bottle. Considering the shipping cost let us put the bench mark as 10 dollars in USA and deducting the ‘recession coefficient’ of 1.8 the optimum prize for a bottle of wine should be 9.2 dollars.

    3. You are going to love me for sharing this secret (presuming you never knew this). Mix wine and beer (like shanty) and go for it. The sweet nature of wine makes it more ‘absorbing’ and you will soon start calling each other machha. I need to admit it here that it is a poor man’s drink.

    4. You are not even asked to mimic it but the way I drink wine – straight from bottle. Hold it by neck and keep drinking it. The look is classy and believe me it makes you look very romantic. For argument sake you can say that we all (most of the time) drink beer straight from stubbies. But that is different. You have that one liter wine bottle in your hand and keep drinking straight from bottle – girls are going to love you for that. Because it looks crude… Responds:

    1. You write: the golden rule of wine is red wine (un chilled always) goes well with red meat

    We have a hypothesis that Red Wine will taste awesome with nicely marinated Tandoori Chicken.

    Unfortunately, the Tandoori Chicken served in most Indian restaurants in the U.S. is plain junk and poorly marinated.

    Even a famed NYC Indian restaurateur/chef like Shiva Natarajan couldn’t get Tandoori Chicken right in his new restaurant Dhaba.

    2. You write: You are going to love me for sharing this secret (presuming you never knew this). Mix wine and beer (like shanty) and go for it….

    We have some Heineken around and some of the Jacob’s Creek Shiraz Cabernet still left…later today or tomorrow we’ll see if we can get the Dutch and Australians to cohabit.

  5. naseer   June 14, 2009 at 4:37 pm

    may be my lines are independent

  6. ajayrocks   June 14, 2009 at 4:58 pm

    Soho is among London’s posh areas. Lined with designer stores and expensive labels, a walk down the street, more often than not, leads to a sighting of the rich and famous.

    On Thursday, there was another member of the glitterati who was walking the streets of Soho. His name? Sachin Ramesh Tendulkar. Arguably the best batsman ever, Tendulkar was in London to announce the latest chapter in the evolution of Brand Sachin – The Tendulkar Opus.

    Billed as the ‘ultimate tribute to a living sporting legend’, this 30-kg book on the little master will be the first opus on a cricketer. Tendulkar will join the likes of Arsenal Football Club, Manchester United, Celtic, Maradona and Formula One in the Opus list.

    A little bit of drama always grabs more eyeballs, and that was the case on Thursday, too when Tendulkar’s DNA sample was taken by a doctor right in the glare of the TV cameras and a surprised audience.

    The idea behind doing this was, as the editor of the Opus, Justyn Barnes, said: “was to capture the real essence of Tendulkar and make sure every detail was taken care of.” Tendulkar will sign each copy of the Opus, making it a collectors’ item.

    “It is humbling to know people follow your career so closely…I am proud to be the first cricketer, and first Indian, to have his own Opus,” said Tendulkar.

    He’ll personally choose photographs and content on this book. “Every picture will have a meaning to it,” said Tendulkar.

    “Like, if it is of Sydney, 2004, it will be about what was going through my mind while batting.” Apart from old photographs, the Opus will also contain previously unpublished content, personally from Tendulkar’s collection.

    Dapper in a jacket and jeans, Tendulkar obliged answered queries from fans – a once in a lifetime opportunity to spend an evening with the world’s greatest cricketer. Responds:

    We notice the above comment/post elsewhere on the net too.

    We see it here and there.


  7. Aswin_Kini   June 15, 2009 at 2:15 am

    SI said:So you think Tamil movie producers are fools.
    Aswin says: Most of them are indeed fools. They think that they can sign up a star for a film with a thrash story and make it run. Well, that’s not quite the case here. Refer to films like Baba, Villu, ATM, AEGAN and what not?

    SI said: So you think Namitha is not a Kollywood Goddess.
    Aswin says: Nope, I think she is one of those human elephants that need to be sent to the local gym to reduce some fat so that she can look like a human being again. Somebody tell this girl that sleaze works only when you have a trim body. AT present even if she strips, people may mistake her for a white hippo!!! Responds:

    1. The So you think….in our previous response were written in a sarcastic vein…not meant as a challenge.

    2. Did you see the bit in our previous response about the Namitha Temple.

    We are planning to get an ‘archanai’ done there to restore the sanity of the Tamil film industry. 😉

  8. a4apple   June 15, 2009 at 2:20 am

    SI said, We have a hypothesis that Red Wine will taste awesome with nicely marinated Tandoori Chicken.

    I would say, Sounds interesting and can see a probability of hypothesis becoming a principle. Of course, as you stated the differentiating factor is ‘nicely marinated’ (ion).

    If you were serious about wine then try this. Lamb chops barbequed (do not marinate it or put all those spices on it. You can brush some olive oil and garlic paste on it) and red wine. Similarly, thin fish fillet (fresh and not frozen); brush some olive oil on it (do not use garlic), some pepper and salt on it, put few thin sliced lemons on it and warp it in an aluminum foil and BBQ it. Serve it with white wine.

    Life will never be the same again. If you want to keep that elevated mood watch Cinema Paradiso along. When you want to return to this unkind world watch a pirated
    version of Fashion and send a hate mail to its idiot director and stupid lead lady. Responds:

    Cinema Paradiso is a lovely movie. Click on this link and scroll down a bit to see a short paragraph on Cinema Paradiso.

    Fashion was garbage plain and simple…can’t understand how some people refer to it in glowing terms.

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