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Goa Review – Insufferable Garbage

 Tamil Movies  29 Responses »
Jan 292010
 
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Sick shit.

That humans in this day and age can put forth garbage like Goa and dare call it a movie boggles the mind.

Folks, of all the Tamil movies we’ve seen in the last five years Goa is the vilest trash of ‘em all.

Before the might of this Goa sewage tsunami, Kuruvi, Villu, Sathyam, Aadhavan, Thoranai et al pale into insignificance.

Goa is a movie that heaps disgrace on the entire Tamil movie industry.

From 4:08PM to 6:57PM (except, mercifully for the 10-minute interval) at MovieShitty in Edison NJ it was a lengthy torture ordeal the likes of which even Stalin’s minions did not inflict on their victims in the cold cellars of the Lubyanka.

Everything is Wrong
Schmuck, ask not what’s wrong with this movie.

Au contraire, ask if there are any redeeming elements at all in Goa.

Ask why in the age of Avatar and Sherlock Holmes and Kaminey trashy films like Goa see the light of the day.

Alas, except for the brief intermission there was not a moment’s respite in the nonsense on the screen.

Clown Prince Behind Goa
The architect of this diabolical misadventure, mind-numbing sophomoric drivel, embarrassing juvenilia is Venkat Prabhu, the clown prince of Kollywood and the bozo at the vanguard of the new wave of crappy Tamil films.

Venkat Prabhu takes (dis)credit for the story, screenplay, dialogs and finally (mis)direction.

* Like a lot of stupid Tamil films, Goa one too begins with a song in the fields abutting a village.

* Like a lot of crappy Tamil films, Goa too is obsessed with love above all.

* Like a lot of bad-ass Tamil films, Goa too inflicts horrible noise and calls it music.

* Like a lot of disgusting Tamil films, Goa too has no story to speak of.

* Like a lot of pathetic Tamil films, Goa too showcases poor acting.

You get the idea, eh?

Three friends (Premji Amaran, Vaibhav Reddy and Jai) in a village, youngsters with raging hormones, strict parents and tired of life in the rural setting, vamoose to Goa – after a pit stop at Madurai – in fond hopes of finding a pretty White girl to marry and then settle abroad.

If you think that’s a pretty weak and lame foundation for a movie what follows after the youths’ arrival in Goa is even worse. The rickety scaffolding just collapses leaving the audience to run for cover from the mayhem unfolding on the screen. Continue reading »

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 Posted by at 11:35 pm  Tagged with: ,

Soundarya Rajinikant’s First Baby is a Freak

 Tamil Movies  No Responses »
Jan 292010
 
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Tamil film superstar Rajinikanth’s daughter Soundarya Rajinikanth’s first baby has turned out to be a ugly, deformed, grotesque freak-show.

The kind of misbegotten orphan you’d want to abandon on the doorsteps of a church.

Folks, Soundarya Rajinikanth’s Ocher Picture Productions’ first baby movie Goa is a pathetic piece of shit.

An abomination, the likes of which are not seen even in the Augean Stables of Kollywood, Goa is what happens when little girls play with toys unsuited to their mental age.

Some movie critics have come down harshly on Goa, which was released today here on the East Coast and in India.

Here’s what a sample of critics had to say on the movie:

Sify:

[I]t’s an excruciatingly predictable fare with no story and at 2 hours and 45 minutes, it’s a laboriously long, and truly a test of your patience. The humour is ordinary and frankly, there is not even a single scene that makes you smile.

SearchIndia.com:

The movie is a ceaseless affront to all notions of taste and utterly without merit.

If Goa sends any message, it’s the pointer to the confederacy of dunces at the helm of the movie business in Tamil Nadu.

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 Posted by at 11:33 pm

Poor Response to Goa

 Tamil Movies  No Responses »
Jan 292010
 
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Goa received a pathetic response from Tamil movie fans for the opening show of the movie on the East Coast.

For the 4:00PM show at MovieShitty on Oak Tree Road in Edison, NJ there were just five people.

An embarrassing debacle, folks.

Of the five, one person was seen frequently getting out of the hall.

We sympathize with him. You see, the movie was plain awful.

Goa is produced by Ocher Picture Productions of Soundarya Rajinikanth (daughter of Tamil film super-star Rajinikanth).

As we left the movie hall at 6:57PM, there were few people waiting in the lobby suggesting the 7:20PM show also might not draw a big crowd.

The low turnout for Goa was despite the fact that no other new Tamil movie released at MovieShitty or elsewhere in the area today.

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 Posted by at 11:29 pm

Ishqiya Review – Charming Ménage à Trois

 Bollywood  6 Responses »
Jan 292010
 
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Box Office: RGV’s Rann Screwed; Ishqiya Saved

We rarely ever see Goras coming to see Bollywood films (unless they stumble into the wrong hall).

So we were surprised to see a Gora buying a ticket for Ishqiya at Regal Commerce.

But then we shouldn’t have been surprised because the fame of Naseeruddin Shah and the positive buzz surrounding this film precedes its release.

With an offbeat story set in the violent badlands of Uttar Pradesh, Ishqiya is a well-told tale of love and crime and deceit and revenge and redemption.

So how can such a movie not be interesting, especially with the fine ensemble of Naseeruddin Shah, Vidya Balan et al.

Vidya Balan is Krishna, the widow of a professional kidnapper who dies in a fiery explosion.

Naseeruddin Shah and Arshad Warsi play thieves Khalujan and Babban respectively. Fleeing from their boss after robbing him, they land up at the house of their old friend Vidyavardhan Verma, only to find him dead.

But their good times come to an end soon after their boss catches up with them.

Meanwhile, the looted money has disappeared and just as it seems there’s no end to their woes, at Krishna’s urging they decide to kidnap a local businessman.

Nice Ménage à Trois
And both Khalujan, he with the fondness for the old Hindi songs, and Babban, he with the raging hormones, fall for the widow. Continue reading »

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 Posted by at 9:10 pm  Tagged with: , , ,

The Prestige Review – Good but Not Great

 Hollywood  13 Responses »
Jan 292010
 
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(For SI blog reader Rakeshbaba)

A short while ago, we watched the Christopher ‘Memento‘ Nolan directed film The Prestige (2006).

The movie is alright (well, by Bollywood standards or lack thereof, most Hollywood films would pass muster) but didn’t get us on a high.

With its central theme of intense rivalry, one-upmanship and revenge between two magicians (played by Hugh Jackman and Christian ‘Batman’ Bale), The Prestige is set for the most part in late 19th century London with a short interlude in America.

The story is reasonably interesting, the photography impressive and there’s even a nice twist at the end.

Sure, the principals Hugh Jackman and Christian Bale were alright. But we didn’t think either of them set the stage on fire. Continue reading »

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 Posted by at 12:46 am
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