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Uthamaputhiran is not so much a movie as a total descent into depravity.

A dystopian nightmare for those sitting through this infernal nonsense.

Written by a jackass answering to the shout of Gopimohan, directed by a bozo named Mithran Jawahar and featuring Rajinikanth’s hideous cartoon of a son-in-law Dhanush in the lead role, Uthamaputhiran is the remake of the Telugu blockbuster Ready.

Armageddon Coming
That movies of this trashy ilk should even be made (Telugu), remade (Tamil) and currently being remade again (Ready, the Hindi version) is perhaps a divine signal that Armageddon is nigh upon us.

In any other country in the world such trash wouldn’t even make it to DVDs. But in an unmistakable sign that Indian audiences are more simian than human such garbage turn into blockbusters (the Telugu version).

Even by the horrendously bad standards of Tamil movies,  Uthamaputhiran’s story is bizarre nonsense.

We have a young man Shiva (Dhanush), whose raison d’etre seems to be help people escape from inconvenient arranged marriages.

During one of his good Samaritan acts that involve kidnapping the bride, Shiva and his buddies accidentally land up in the wrong marriage hall and unwittingly kidnap the wrong bride. Although Shiva and his friends are aghast over their mistake, the bride (Genelia D’Souza) herself, once she wakes up from her drug-induced unconscious state, is elated.

Apparently, this bride too was most unhappy about the marriage she was being coerced into by scheming relatives aspiring to her riches.

Before long, she has managed to elude the pursuers hot on her heels and is firmly ensconced in Shiva’s house with the aid of a few lies.  Soon, the girl has endeared herself to all at her new home. Meanwhile, Shiva himself is persona non grata at his house for helping his cousin flee from her marriage sometime earlier. Continue reading »

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Sure, VA Quarter Cutting is a change from your average Tamil movie, which invariably is a soporific, cronge-inducing romance.

Maybe even better than the trash that emerges from the Kollywood sewers most Fridays.

Although different, VA Quarter Cutting (directed by Pushkar-Gayatri) is not the kind of movie that keeps your eyes glued to the screen.

For one, the movie at about 2 hours and 20 minute is too long given its bare-bone theme of a young fella’s desperate late-night search, in the company of his future brother-in-law, for a liquor bottle in Chennai.

You may sympathize with the desperate cravings of our young man Sura (Shiva) if you know that he’s leaving in the morning for Saudi Arabia where booze is, of course, verboten.

Shiva plays the young man Sura and S.P.B.Charan his future brother-in-law Marthandam.

Guy Ritchie Redux
VA Quarter Cutting is a Guy Ritchie style movie.

Frenetic in its wild, quirky action and with a large cast of oddball, colorful characters (of different sizes ranging from midgets to giants) engaging in all sorts of weird antics. Think Snatch, think Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, think RocknRolla. Hell, think even Sherlock Holmes (the Robert Downey version).

Not surprisingly, we even heard echoes of the music from Guy Ritchie’s film Sherlock Holmes in VA Quarter Cutting. If you are curious, we are referring to Hans Zimmer’s Discombobulate track from Sherlock Holmes.

Besides our two main characters, in VA Quarter Cutting we have an arsonist, a father-son duo running an illegal gambling center, two underlings of the gambling den owners, a female cop, a suicidal young girl et al.

Lekha Washington is Saro, the young girl, who has turned suicidal, after repeatedly flunking her school exams.

While the Guy Ritchie genre may be new to Tamil movies, it’s not new per se. Just an extension of this style to Tamil films.

None of the characters disappoint but they don’t light up the screen either. Shiva and S.P.B.Charan hog the maximum screen time.

The dialogs do not sparkle, merely adequate.

Overall, we’d say VA Quarter Cutting is an okayish film.

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We have a question for all ye schmucks.

Is there nothing more to life than love?

Movie after movie churned out by these Bollywood and Kollywood buffoons have love front and center.

A tiring idee fixe really. :(

Mynaa is no different given its choice of love as the central theme.

But Mynaa also dares to be different from the run of the mill Tamil movies in its sylvan rural setting, new actors and for eschewing the happy-end fixation of Indian films.

The movie is also different for one more reason: Before the film starts, its makers express their gratitude to Jesus in no uncertain terms.

What role Jesus played in the making of this film is not clear to us.

Yet Another Love Story
The movie traces the story of an illiterate villager Surli (Vidharth) and his deep affection and love for Mynaa (Amala Paul).

But it’s an unidimensional and weird fixation. There’s not much of anything else in the movie. What little there is such as the jailbreak also has love at the back of it. Continue reading »

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