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Dec 082014

Much as I’m convinced that god does not exist, there’s occasional proof that he does.

Folks, Action Jackson is a mighty disaster at the U.S. box office.

Nothing pleases me more than to see chimps like Ajay Devgn and Prabhu Deva kissing the dust when they put out so trashy a film as Action Jackson.

Here are the opening weekend U.S. box office numbers for Action Jackson:

Action Jackson - A Dud in U.S.

Related Posts:
Action Jackson Review – Infernal Garbage
Dec 052014

When a girl’s luck changes drastically for the better each time she espies the dick of a young man exiting the loo/dressing room, you know Bollywood is plumbing Satanic lows.

Eternally burdened by ill-luck (at office, movie halls, restaurants etc), life is at a low ebb for Khushi (Sonakshi Sinha).

Dame luck will smile on this cow only if she sees the dick of Vishy (Ajay Devgan), a fact the idiotic Jonah makes no secret of to her friends.

So desperate is Khushi to marry an Indian groom from America that she runs looking for Vishy or rightly speaking looking for his lucky dicky.

I’m not exaggerating, not even by a degree. I swear!

Alas, ‘dick-luck’ is merely one of countless dickhead elements littered throughout the atrocious Action Jackson depravity.

Action Jackson is not so much a movie as the collective vomit expelled by director Prabhu Deva, Ajay Devgan, Sonakshi Sinha, Anand Raj et al on the faces of the audience.

As is her wont, Sonakshi Sinha wears the constant demeanor of a drooling cow lethargically, moronically chewing the cud after grazing around the entire neighborhood. Mercifully, this bovine creature’s time on screen is short.

Ajay Devgan’s soporific performance and selection of this insane film is incontrovertible proof that brain damage is hereditary.

Cuckoo father, cuckoo son!

Bizarre Story

The story is infantile in its entirety, ‘written’ by an ass aka A.C. Mughil.

Bizarrely silly but par for the course in Bollywood (Don, Rowdy Rathore, Dhoom 3, Billa, Aaradhana etc had lookalikes), there are two Ajay Devgans in Action Jackson.

The first Ajay (Vishy) is a small Mumbai thug who uses his hands to bash up his victims.

A Bangkok-based killer and right-handman of an international arms dealer Xavier (Anand Raj), the second Ajay (AJ) uses his sword to dispatch his victims.

Hands= Mumbai Ajay; Sword=Thailand Ajay. Comprende? Continue reading »

Dec 032014

On rainy wintry days, nothing like a shot of brandy and a good action-packed Korean film to rouse me from my torpor.

It must be a blessed stroke of luck that dropped the Korean film Yong-eui-ja (aka The Suspect, 2013) DVD into my hands yesterday.

Gave me the adrenalin jolt I so desperately craved.

Korean Bourne

The Suspect follows along the lines of earlier Korean hits like Berlin File and Yellow Sea in delivering a fast-paced, slick, tension-filled thriller with a solid actor helming the stunt scenes.

Set within the framework of brutal killings, torture, vengeance, betrayals, demonic greed, North Korea-South Korea tensions and featuring shadowy dirty intelligence operatives playing fiendish games, these Korean movies are not inferior in any respect to Hollywood’s Bourne franchise.

Shin-yeon Won has superbly directed The Suspect based on the story by Lim Sang-Yoon.

The life of a defector in a new country is never an easy one. More so for former North Korean elite military officer Ji Dong-Cheol (Gong Yoo), who defected to the south after troubling political changes in his native land and the murders of his wife and daughter. Continue reading »

Nov 252014

Just back from India. I had the most amazing dysentery.
– A young woman in The Great Beauty

How do you describe something for which there’s no frame of reference in the cinematic universe.

I watched the 2013 Italian film The Great Beauty (La grande bellezza) the other night.

Bulging eyes, dropping jaws, utter rapture!

Never have I felt so fulfilled. Not even when impaled on the sword of lust has such an electric thrill coursed through me. ;)

The Great Beauty is everything I long for in a movie (but alas seldom get) – Novelty, bewitching visual appeal, terrific writing, insights into human behavior, top-class music, unpredictable and, above all, remarkable acting.

Co-written and directed by Paolo Sorrentino, the movie follows 65-year-old journalist Jep Gambardella as he goes about Rome partying, meeting pretty girls and old friends, walking on quiet streets and occasionally interviewing artistes.

An easy going charming fellow, Jep’s claim to fame rests on an award winning book, The Human Apparatus, he authored four decades earlier.

Endless Highs

Art, religion, youth, beauty, sex, lust, love, bizarre stuff, despair, daily pettiness, regret, mortality and what have you make their appearances and exits, all with a grandeur rarely seen on the screen. Continue reading »

Oct 312014

Think of our newscast as a screaming woman running down the street with her throat cut.
– TV station News director Nina (Rene Russo) to Louis Bloom (Jake Gyllenhaal) in Nightcrawler

Don’t you dare count me among the surprised when Jake Gyllenhaal has his hands full with trophies during the coming awards season for a superb performance in Nightcrawler.

I’ve seen a whole bunch of Gyllenhaal films including the Oscar winning Brokeback Mountain (where our man played a gay cowboy and for which he got the Best Supporting Actor nomination) but I think Nightcrawler is his best performance in a lead role.

A remarkable portrayal of a chilling character!

Night Thriller

Made on a modest budget of $8 million, Nightcrawler is anything but a crawler.

Call it a dark, night-thriller and you’d be right on the money!

The film is a fast-paced, crisply written account of ‘nightcrawler’ Louis Bloom (Jake Gyllenhaal) racing wildly, dangerously on the nocturnal streets of Los Angeles to capture graphic video footage of murders, home invasions, fires, car-jackings, horrific accidents and other bloody scenes to be sold to local TV stations.

And if the victim is a White middle-class or upper class person living in the suburbs, all the better from the TV station point of view (White Americans live in mortal dread of crime creeping into and sullying their cosy, pristine suburban White neighborhoods). Continue reading »

Oct 302014

I’m proud to be gay, and I consider being gay among the greatest gifts God has given me.
– Apple CEO Tim Cook

Apple CEO Tim Cook on Being GayApple CEO Tim Cook – Yippee, God made Me Gay
(Image courtesy: Business Insider)

Being rich and famous brings one undeniable advantage.

You can not only get away with drooling out the most nonsensical statements but fawning putzheads will applaud seeing courage and wisdom in your drivel.

Take Apple CEO Tim Cook for instance.

The man is all over the news today because he’s just proclaimed that being a cocksucker is God’s greatest gift.

Now there’s absolutely nothing wrong or immoral in being a cocksucker or delight in getting fucked in the fanny (I happen to believe homosexuality is more a genetic, pre-determined affair than a matter of individual choice).

Your anterior and posterior orifices, body appendages and openings are yours to do with what thrills you the most.

But the twaddle that cock-sucking is God’s greatest blessing can come only from a dickhead.

God has absolutely nothing to do with your passion to blow your partner, rim him, take his schlong up your backside or shove yours up his Hershey-hole. Merely your raging hormones at play.

It’s bad enough that billions of Earthlings continue to cling to the ridiculous fiction of God’s existence in the face of rampant injustice.

But for a public figure like Tim Cook to add cocksucking and assfucking to the asinine catalog of God’s “greatest” blessings is insane.

Why rely on the crutch of a non-existent God to defend your different sexual orientation. Beats me.

What next?

Nuclear weapons are God’s greatest gift to humans?

Related Content:
Tim Cook Speaks Up