Predators Review – Lacks Drama, Not Impressed

(For SI Blog readers VJ Cool, Abhi et al)

You know what I’m saying.
Yeah, 5’O clock, Bitch-Raping time

Hey, VJ Cool and Abhi we want our money back. 🙁

All $8 of it.

That’s what happens when we ignore our inner voice and pay heed to our readers. We were keen on seeing The Girl Who Played With Fire, the second installment in the late Swedish writer Stieg Larsson’s fantastic trilogy.

And if we had any brains, we shoulda paid heed to the frenetic whisperings warnings in our head about Predators and gone to The Girl Who Played With Fire.


So disappointed with Predators that we hit the bottle early today. Any excuse will do. 😉 

Gin+Seltzer Water (Lime flavor) and Idli+Onion Chutney on the side is a potent combination. Strongly recommended.

Why We are Disappointed
When we go to a movie, we look for stuff like solid drama, engaging story, decent acting, crisp dialogs, eye-catching photography, good action, pleasing music, fine humor, nice graphics, pretty babes et al.

Sure, rare is the movie that delivers on all fronts but even if a film delivers the goods on a few of them we feel we’ve gotten our money’s worth, baby.

Paisa vasool, as the schmucks in India are wont to say.

Except to a limited extent with the action, graphics and photography, Predators does not set the screen on fire.

No sir, it does not.

The Predators story in essence is that of a bunch of really unsavory guys (and one gal) of different nationalities and ethnicities dropped off into a thick jungle on a strange planet and trying their best to escape, first from weird animals with long horns and later from some brilliant, weird monsters.

Sure, with a good writer that could well form the framework or outer shell of a nice movie.

Alas, all we have to run with, as our characters keep doing so in the face of imminent danger, is the empty shell.

The movie starts with a man falling fast and furious in space and the parachute opening opening just moments before hits the jungle ground. Similar is the fate for others, except for one unlucky soul.

From then on, it’s all traipsing into the lush jungle, firing their heavy artillery at the predators and then traipsing  into the forest again. Repeat this sequence ad nauseum till the end of the movie.

A lot of fireballs and the death of all but a couple of the members and it’s time to leave the air-conditioned hall into the fiery mid-Atlantic summer.

The action scenes were alright but nothing spectacular.

Ditto with the graphics. Nothing gee whiz about them.

As for the acting, fuggedaboutit.Very pedestrian.

Plenty of illogical elements. All their guns are exposed to water when they fall down the cataract into the raging waters and still they work well. Their ammunition never runs out. And what the f*ck are they eating for sustenance?

The ending, after all the fighting and firing and fleeing, is kinda flat and the basic issue of getting off the planet still remains unresolved.

By Bollywood standards, Predators (directed by Nimród Antal) is not a complete disaster and we are even tempted to say watchable but no, we won’t.

Folks, this weekend, for a change extend your middle finger to a Hollywood film as high as you can.

8 Responses to "Predators Review – Lacks Drama, Not Impressed"

  1. STG   July 9, 2010 at 5:28 pm

    I remember you liked Kontroll (Hungarian film) from this director… Responds:

    Boy, you are one smart dude! 🙂


    Kontroll was a lovely film with an engaging, gripping story. Sadly, Predators is not in the same league.

  2. abhi220   July 9, 2010 at 6:56 pm

    sh*t. Already booked for late night. BTW heard The Girl Who Played With Fire is not anyway near good as the previous installment. Responds:

    Who knows!

    Maybe, you’ll like it (doubt it really). As we hinted toward the end of the above piece, even if you don’t love Predator it certainly won’t get you in a high dudgeon a la most Bollywood movies. BTW, the theater was more than 50% full for the opening show at 12:00PM.

    Yeah, we also read somewhere that The Girl Who Played With Fire doesn’t pack the excitement or thrill of its predecessor. But it still gets high marks.

    If The Girl Who Played With Fire is playing in the same theater you might want to consider exchanging the tickets.

    Dunno about you but we’ll take Kalle ‘f*cking’ Blomkvist and Salander over these predators any day.

    If we were not so sloshed, we’d have gone out to the movie now.

    • abhi220   July 10, 2010 at 1:43 am

      Just got back after 10 show. Maybe, i’ll like it? No way..
      The Girl …. is on a different league altogether.
      This I felt like watching a B grade movie.
      To make matters worse, had to stick to the 3rd row from screen.
      Just watch Pianist and you won’t even believe he is the same guy.
      For me this is a huge disappointment in every department.
      Creators wanted to make some easy money with out doing anything original.
      SI readers, dont even think about going to this movie. Responds:

      Agree, just not worth it.

      At least, we got decent seats – third row from the back.

      • vjcool   July 10, 2010 at 10:44 pm

        yup it’s a B movie, but would have like it to be a good B movie like the original 1987 Predator. This was touted to be the sequel that should have been.

        Anyway.. I still have the offer open – to pay up if you don’t like a Miyazaki Film. Try ‘Howl’s moving Castle’ or ‘Castle in the Sky’, ‘Spirited away’ has much Japanese imagery and one of the quirkiest. ‘Princess Mononoke’ is the most violent. ‘My Neighbor Totoro’ is very loving..
        ‘Porco Rosso’ is romantic,.. ‘Kiki’s Delivery Service’ is simple and cute

        Well.. Try one, anyone of these. I would like to see the review. Plz. Surprise yourself.

        Toy Story3 will also do.. but you already know that kind of film making.,8599,1838053,00.html Responds:

        Alas, except for Miyazaki’s old Lupin the 3rd: The Castle of Cagliostro none of his other films are available on Instant Play.

        • chennaiarun2007   July 11, 2010 at 11:00 am

          @ vjkool,

          FYI,Predator 2 (1990) was a better and pretty decent sequel to the original 1987 Predator.

          Predator 2 stared Danny Glover who acted pretty well as the hunted victim.

          The panic reaction shown by him when he was hunted by the alien was pretty fantastic and engaging.

          I remember watching this film about 5 years back. Though the climax wasn’t as thrilling as the original Predator, it was engaging to an extent.

          Also in Predators 2, Kevin Peter Hall reprises the role of original alien character(which he played in Predator).


          1.The original Predator had its story set in lush green jungles in and around Vietnam(my guess!!) while Predators 2 had a city as its setting.

          2.As far as dramatic moments go,the original had plenty.Predators 2 had some poignant and engaging moments too.


          One of these days, we’ll watch the ‘original predator’ films and see if they are better than the new Predators.

          • vjcool   July 15, 2010 at 6:42 am


            I expected, you would watch Predator 1 and 2, or atleast 1 before reviewing Predators (like you did with Vijay’s latest movie)


            I’ve watched Predator 2 and also the AVP movies, the AVP were damp squibs. but Pred 2 is a decent sequel. The original was a mystery action surprise, testosterone rich movie. The second had actors and they tried their best to continue the story. Did watch it many times on TV. but I prefer the first one, that I watched on screen, rented on Cassettes and VCD and now have the DVD. kinda guilty pleasure


            Will watch the two Predators one of these days.

  3. priya890   July 10, 2010 at 2:54 pm

    Hey, TOY STORY 3 might be running in theatres somewhere around you!?? After all its It has creeped into IMDB top 10. If a film has such a feat then there might be something special in it!

    Currently its the 6TH!!!.

    It hasn’t released in KERALA yet. Really want to see this movie! Read many reviews… and all are saying one word “MASTERPIECE!!!”. GODDD when will it release here??

    So plz don’t waste ur time on these unimpressive movies(predator, eclipse, i hate luv stories, raavan and all), try to watch this film and plz REVIEW it!!! plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz… Responds:

    Parkalam (we’ll see).

    • STG   July 11, 2010 at 12:52 am

      SI is not a big fan for animated movies. It bashed UP movie which was rated 98% in RT…I bet you will never get a review for Toy story 3 😉 Responds:

      You Write Above: It bashed UP movie which was rated 98% in RT

      Well, Raavan got 70% on RT and Kites got 82%.

      What does that tell you about RT? Ha ha ha.

      Now, we’re gonna have some more Jägermeister. 😉

      Just finished watching Serendipity. 1:43AM ET.

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