We’re Far Too Young but You Schmucks can Try

A short while ago, we received an e-mail that we’ve reproduced verbatim below:


My name is Matt Porter, and I am a filmmaker and recent New York University graduate.

I am searching for an Indian couple, ideally a husband and wife, over the age of 50 who would both be interested in acting in a comedic short film. The project will be filming from the 23rd to the 27th of August right outside Stamford, Connecticut. They would be playing very important roles, and although our budget it too low to pay them per day, we will be able to reimburse travel and feed them each day of the shoot. They will be involved in a professional short film, and in the end would receive a copy on a DVD.

No prior experience acting is necessary. We will conduct auditions in Manhattan and/or in Connecticut next week, so we can meet anyone who is interested.

Any help you could possibly give us with finding people who might be interested would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you very much,

Matt Porter // Producer, Director
Polivision Productions

Now, don’t blame us if your wife runs off with the (presumably young) recent graduate Matt and your kids start questioning you about Amma’s new friend Matt ‘uncle.’

Nor will we be held responsible if Matt fails to pay your bus fare or feed you or takes risque pictures that appear in a future edition of Playboy for Geriatrics or the movie fails to win an Oscar.

In short, we’re not responsible for anything that may or may not happen to you. 😉


OK Matt, do you think we’ve done enough to spread the word.

BTW Matt, we strongly suggest you keep a big bottle of cologne handy. You see, Indians are not the most pleasant-smelling people on the planet. 😉

And you owe us lunch at a stinking Indian restaurant in NYC for this post.

3 Responses to "We’re Far Too Young but You Schmucks can Try"

  1. rakeshbaba   August 3, 2010 at 1:26 pm

    wats ur first reaction when you first seen this mail??

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    Our first reaction was: Alas, we’re still only 16. We have at least another 34 years to go. 😉

  2. முனிAndy   August 3, 2010 at 1:59 pm

    Matt, SI is lying.. they are couple in their 50s. But El Niño may contend that their comedic timing is not good.

    SI, There’s a possibility that the husband may run away with him too..

    FB is so bad.. It shows us Matt’s picture and tells us that his 19 year old sister is married to a girl.. and also says that she is interested in men. Bye, bye privacy.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    If we’re a day over 16, you can have our thongs. 😉

    Matt, do you still want to make movies with Indians?

    As this above (முனிAndy) commenter’s behavior testifies, Indians are creepy, snoopy, nasty, stinky buggers best handed over to the Arizona Police for quick deportation. 😉

    • முனிAndy   August 3, 2010 at 3:19 pm

      Jai Nookella Maa!

      SearchIndia.com Responds:

      Poor Nookella is now a Jokella.

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