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Kurbaan Review – You are the Sacrificial Lamb, Sucker

 Bollywood  44 Responses »
Nov 202009
 
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God Exists: Trashy Kurbaan Trashed at Box Office 

Folks, if you are the sort that get your jollies by sacrificing yourself on the altar of crappy Bollywood films by all means watch this garbage called Kurbaan.

For 2 hours and 40 minutes, we looked hard for any redeeming elements in Kurbaan but came a cropper.

Zilch. Nada. Nichts.

Centered around a bunch of Muslim terrorists plotting a terror attack in the U.S., Kurbaan is not merely a no-thrills non-thriller but overall a piece of amateurish shit that has no business being released in theaters anywhere.

The Short of It
Take the worst elements of Bollywood movies like Fanaa and New York, deduct all the thrills from Hollywood films like Arlington Road, throw in that anorexic, worthless actress Kareena Kapoor, add that one-expression-all-through-the-movie Saif Ali Khan and bring in the constipated maid-fucker Om Puri, voila, there you have this vile trash a.k.a. Kurbaan.

Hey, if there’s any remotely credible act of terrorism in Kurbaan, it’s what Karan Johar (credited with this sophomoric story) and the lobotomized cast of this junk unleash on unsuspecting members of the audience.

An Adharma Production
Peppered with cliched dialogs (did you think of me last night, are you afraid of your feelings for me), infested with badass actors (foremost among them Kareena Kapoor) and littered with illogical elements (far too many, hello, has anyone heard of 911), Kurbaan is an unforgivable, insufferable act of adharma (injustice). Continue reading »

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 Posted by at 5:37 pm

Kurbaan is Disappointing, say Critics

 Bollywood  10 Responses »
Nov 202009
 
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God Exists: Trashy Kurbaan Trashed at Box Office

Kurbaan, the Saif Ali Khan-Kareena Kapoor film that has terrorism as its central theme, has not found favor with some of the prominent Indian movie critics.

Here’s what a gaggle of critics in India has to say on Kurbaan:

* SearchIndia.com

Take the worst elements of Bollywood movies like Fanaa and New York, deduct all the thrills from Hollywood films like Arlington Road, throw in that anorexic, worthless actress Kareena Kapoor, add that one-expression-all-through-the-movie Saif Ali Khan and bring in the constipated maid-fucker Om Puri, voila, there you have this vile trash a.k.a. Kurbaan.

Hey, if there’s any remotely credible act of terrorism in Kurbaan, it’s what Karan Johar (credited with this sophomoric story) and the lobotomized cast of this junk unleash on unsuspecting members of the audience.

* NDTV

The film has ambition but it is too flawed and simplistic to explore issues like religion, violence and the politics of terrorism with any conviction or gravitas.

….Kurbaan is a disappointment.

* DNA

You are not quite sure after watching Kurbaan what exactly the motive behind making the film is. Was it designed to be a thriller? Then, in the almost 2hrs and 40minutes of its running time, it’s too long at dips at various points to be able to thrill you enough.

Was it supposed to be a love story? Then it fails on that count because the ‘lovers’ in the film come across as shallow. Was the film supposed to be a comment on global terrorism? Then it’s a haphazard one, raising questions (old ones at that) and not bothering to give any answers.

Actually, Kurbaan is a mish-mash of all of the above, and with a seduction scene and ‘main badla loonga’ angle thrown in, reminds one of the formulaic films made in the 80s. Continue reading »

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 Posted by at 8:41 am

Godavari Review – Kamalinee Sole Consolation

 Telugu Movies  13 Responses »
Nov 202009
 
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(Recommended by supergirl and elnino.aurora)

Move over Vimala Raman, Tabu, Meera Jasmine, Navya Nair et al.

We have a new squeeze now – Kamalinee Mukherjee. ;)

If that stupid shit Godavari (2006) has any redeeming elements, it came in the form of the talented Bengali babe Kamalinee Mukherjee.

The young lass plays the role of a feisty, independent, stubborn girl Seetamahalakshmi, who falls in love with a U.S. returned engineer Sri Ram (Sumanth), also a good samaritan who aspires to be a politician.

After seeing clowns like Kajal Agarwal and Kanagana Ranaut in Telugu films, it’s a relief to behold someone like Kamalinee Mukherjee who packs decent acting skills.

Much of film is set on a boat journey on the Godavari river from Rajahmundry to Bhadrachalam.

While that is a novelty, the photography of the river didn’t leave us spellbound notwithstanding the paeans sung to it in the film.

Consider us cuckoo if you want but we kinda felt that director Sekhar Kammula may have drawn some inspiration from Gabriel Garcia Marquez’ Love in the Time of Cholera. The river has a strong presence in the book and the final scenes involve a long romantic boat trip taken by Fermina Daza and Florentino Ariza.

Not that Godavari has any of the grandeur of Marquez’ book. In fact none of it.

This is trite romantic shit, albeit a little polished by Telugu film standards. None of those asinine fights or silly song-dances in Switzerland in Godavari. Continue reading »

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 Posted by at 3:39 am
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