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If we were Priyanka Chopra today we would be seriously thinking of either jumping off the tallest Mumbai skyscraper or quietly lying down in the tower of silence and let the vultures feast on us.

Priyanka Chopra can’t act.

Not even if her life depended on it. She’s bad even by Bollywood’s lowly standards.

The woman is the female Abhishek Bachchan, a disgrace to the Indian movie industry.

The hopeless star’s latest crap-show 7 Khoon Maaf, which received a terrible review in the New York Times, has fared miserably at the box office, the U.S. box office that is.

For the February 18-20, 2011 weekend, 7 Khoon Maaf managed a piddling $164,153 and an average gross of just $2,525.

7 Khoon Maaf’s pathetic performance at the box office suggest Bollywood fans have squarely shown Priyanka Chopra the middle finger.

Here’s how 7 Khoon Maaf fared at the U.S. box office compared to a few recent Bollywood films:

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Consumers who pay Amazon $79 annually for two-day shipping for all their purchases got a bonus today – free, unlimited streaming of movies and TV shows.

But Amazon’s streaming selection under the new program is rather anemic -  A mere 5,000 movies and TV shows.

Nothing like the 20,000 plus titles Netflix’ offers to its members who pay $7.99 a month.

SearchIndia.com recommends that if you crave movies as much as we do, then Netflix is the better deal.

Netflix’ collection of Bollywood movies is improving on the streaming side too. Recent Hindi films like Guzaarish and No one Killed Jessica have already made it to Netflix Instant Play.

By the way, Amazon has been offering a separate Instant Video service for rent or purchase with a collection of 90,000 titles. We doubt that program has gained much traction.

With 20 million members in U.S. and Canada, Netflix has better market share and mind share in the movie/TV shows streaming game.

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Update (March 1, 2011) : 11 Sentenced to Death, 20 to Life in Prison

The killing of 59 Hindu devotees in a train near Godhra railway station (in the western Indian state of Gujarat) was not an accident but a conspiracy, a Special Court in Ahmedabad ruled today.

Special Court judge P.R.Patel convicted 31 people for the murder of the Hindu devotees by a Muslim mob and acquitted 63 others.

It’s safe to assume that the majority of the convicted as well as the accused in the Godhra train burning case are Muslims.

The sentences will be pronounced on February 25.

Some 59 Hindu devotees returning from a visit to the holy city of Ayodha were killed in the Sabarmati Express train coach S-6 in February 2002 when a Muslim mob set fire to the coach by throwing petrol bombs and hurling kerosene and petrol into the coach.

In retaliation for the Godhra killings, Hindu butchers went on a retaliatory danse macabre slaughtering several hundred Muslims.

Two committees that looked into the Godhra train burning incident reached opposite conclusions.

The Nanavati Commission (appointed by the Gujarat government) concluded it was a pre-planned conspiracy while the U.C.Banerjee panel (appointed by the central government) held that it was accidental.

Modi was Right
The verdict is a shot in the arm for Gujarat Chief Minister Narendra Modi who was vilified for calling the Godhra train burning a “pre-planned massacre.”

But we consider Modi, a Hindu, guilty for failing to prevent the Hindu mobs from butchering several hundred Muslims in the retaliatory attacks of February-March 2002.

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* Wasabi – Surprise, surprise.

Yes, we were surprised, but really shouldn’t have been, after seeing Wasabi to learn that a Tamil movie ‘released’ last year was based on this 2001 French film.

Jean Reno (Léon, Les rivières pourpres, Ronin et al) is the saving grace of this average film. Reno plays Hubert Florentini, a violent Paris cop pining for a Japanese lover Miko who abruptly disappeared from his life 19 years earlier.

Hubert’s life is upended after getting a call about Miko’s death and discovers a 19-year-old daughter Yumi (Ryōko Hirosue) he never knew existed. The action shifts from Paris to Tokyo but the story is mediocre at best. Ryōko Hirosue acts like a complete retard. Do all Japanese teenagers behave like that?

For the curious, Gérard Krawczyk is the director.

* Sabah – Yet another cross-cultural romance with all its attendant problems. Continue reading »

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When it comes to begging, none can beat Indians.

With several centuries of diligent practice behind them, Indians have honed begging into an art form.

Not long ago, we were at the receiving end of one such beggar in Jersey City, NJ.

We were standing on Newark Ave in Jersey City (NJ) considering which of the two Indian restaurants – Horn OK Please or Vatan – should be deified with our presence when a man in black suit jumped out of Vatan and begged us to come in.

$8.99 only, Waijatariyan pood, Pliss come, Pliss come. Pure Waijatariyan, the man ejaculated in that stupid accent unique to semi-literate Gujjus. And his face had that anxious, pained, constipated expression Gujjus sport between two visits to the Swaminarayan temple.

Since the milk of human kindness overfloweth in our breasts, we decided to give our Tandoori Chicken and Lamb Vindaloo craving taste-buds a rest and bless Vatan with our benign presence.

Vegetable Tikka Masala, Dal Tadka & Naan

Barely a few months old (it opened on the Hindu festival day of Diwali), Vatan has no fancy ambiance to speak of. Six booths to the left (as you enter), a few tables on the right and a small room with floor seating!

The restaurant is obviously not doing that well because despite the menu stating $14.99 as the weekend buffet price, the actual cost is only $8.99 on Friday (goes up to $11.99 on Sat & Sun).

Vatan’s owner Nikhil claims he intends to raise the price in May once business picks up.

Ha ha ha. Fat chance. Keep dreaming, Nikhil! Continue reading »

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Bloody hell.

How the f*ck can you get bowled out for 69 in the World Cup.

Well, you can’t unless you are a bunch of cattle grazing idiots like the Kenyans. Continue reading »

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