Heroes – Boring Indian Army Recruitment Ad

Zeroes Oops Heroes Fails to Sizzle at Box Office

What a bloody waste of time.

What a dreadful waste of money ($9 for our ticket not to mention the crores down the drain on the film).

What an awful waste of film-stock.

Directed by Samir Karnick, Heroes’ first claim to infamy is the coming together of four of the most incompetent actors in Bollywood in a single movie – Salman Khan, Sohail Khan, Sunny Deol and Bobby Deol.

Second, Heroes plays a cruel trick on viewers by fobbing off a bad recruitment ad for the Indian armed forces as a Hindi movie.


Two young friends Sammy (Sohail Khan) and Nawab Saab (Vatsal Sheth) set off on a motorbike trip to make a movie on why you should not join the Indian armed forces in order to get their degree in film-making.

The friends meet the families of three soldiers – Balkar Singh (Salman Khan), Dhananjay Shergill (Bobby Deol) and Sahil Naqvi (Dino Morea) who gave their lives defending the nation.

With each meeting, we get boring vignettes of the martyrs and the dear ones they left behind – Balkar’s widow Kuljeet Kaur (Preity Zinta) and adorable young son (??), Dhananjay’s crippled brother Vikram Shergill (Sunny Deol) and Sahil’s angry father Dr.Naqvi (Mithun Chakravorty).

Such is the slender thread on which this dud of a movie hangs.

As the wise ones say, Garbage in = Garbage out.

So what can you really expect when you tie together Salman Khan, Sohail Khan, Sunny Deol and Bobby Deol in a single movie – what else but a  Molotov cocktail of garbage that explodes in the hapless viewers’ faces.

Will somebody please euthanize these four gadhas. Their time’s up and they’re outstaying their welcome in Bollywood.

With their pathetic performances in movie after movie, the two Khans and the two Deols have inflicted more harm on the Indian psyche than any other invaders, marauders and criminals in the country’s past or the present. All four should have been put to pasture aeons ago but the leeches steadfastly refuse to leave and linger on to torment and suck the blood from millions of Bollywood fans.

The sight of a crippled Sunny Deol fighting a whole gang of ruffians in a bar from his wheelchair is enough to send any sane individual into a wheelchair.

Sunny Deol can’t act when he is standing straight. To put this bozo in a wheelchair and ask him to act is like feeding a chimp some liquor and then asking it to explain the Theory of Relativity. Sunny Deol even messed up a simple scene which just required him to describe how he lost his legs.

Mercifully for viewers, his younger – and lesser talented – brother Bobby Deol has a very brief role in Heroes, a cameo as Captain Dhanjay Shergill.

Silly and constipated – that’s how Salman Khan looks and acts as the soldier Balkar Singh. Akshay Kumar was light years better as a Sikh in that crappy movie Singh is Kinng.

The less said of the third soldier Dino Morea or his angry “father” Mithun Chakravorty the better.

If there are any saving graces in Heroes, it’s in the aging Preity Zinta, who does a decent job as the man of the family after her husband’s death.

Of all the song-dances in Heroes, Makhana featuring the Deol dodos inflicts the most agony. Both Deols just can’t dance just as they can’t act. What they are doing in Bollywood is anyone’s guess.

Skip Heroes by all means.

There are better things to do this Diwali than watching a worse than sophomoric piece of crap like Heroes.

10 Responses to "Heroes – Boring Indian Army Recruitment Ad"

  1. shuaib68   October 26, 2008 at 2:08 am

    Blame it on the “boogie” the viewers are getting out of these pictures by seeing it in the screen. They’ll keep on coming to watch anything that is presenetd to them.

    The producers of garbages knows that there is a market to sell them. So, business is about demand and supply. But, the clientele is falling off for sure as we see it with many of the flops that we did saw recently. The FANs are the real base of these producers as they’re sure they could at least recover 50% of their cost of production.

    That’s why I requested the SI to find out about any operation that would help me to STAPLE our eyelids to stay away from these horrible sights.

  2. mallukuttan   October 26, 2008 at 3:21 pm

    Sh$thead Salman & Crew sucks..

    Did u guys buy Yuvraaj Audio CD? Disappointing for me 🙁

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    We were not that impressed either. But we have to wait and see how they are picturized.

    Music in Indian movies often cannot be separated from the movies.

    When we first heard Fanaa songs, we were not that impressed. But when we saw the movie, we felt more drawn to the music, particularly Chand Sifarish.

  3. abhaytiku   October 30, 2008 at 2:00 am

    “Such is the slender thread on which this dud of a movie hangs”

    Well, the plot sounds different and good, they just chose a wrong cast to do justice to the storyline. Can’t expect much from the multi starrers anyway as the accumulation of starcast is to somehow bait the population to cinemas to fill the purses of these people. Anyway, the flagging state where careers of Deol’s is tethering, an association with Khan’s (that also Salman only, the other guy is a sliver of his shadow) could have sparked some interest to push people to theaters.

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    When we pay $9, we expect to see acting not facial/body contortions on the screen.

    We hear that ticket prices in India (at the multiplexes) are over Rs 300. Charging such high prices and not delivering the very basic goods in terms of acting or the story tantamounts to cheating in our dictionary.

  4. aditya_k   October 31, 2008 at 1:11 pm

    haven’t seen the movie yet but every other website has given a positive review……confused!!!!!

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    You write above: haven’t seen the movie yet but every other website has given a positive review……

    That’s not accurate. Some other reviewers have been critical too. The box office results have not been impressive either.

  5. aditya_k   November 3, 2008 at 7:21 am

    watched heroes….i think the story was good….was it original? the actors messed it up big time……why did they have to take all those fools?there are youngsters (ranbir kapoor,imran khan) who have done well recently….still they decided to cast vatsal seth & sohail(he should be shot)…..only preity gave a decent performance….the film would have been infinitely better with decent actors….i particularly feel bad for the scene where sohail & vatsal stand at the border in punjab…and fail to live up to the scene….

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    1. Truth be said 99.999% of Bollywood or Kollywood movies are no better or no worse than Heroes.

    2. Yes, we agree that scene on the border was wasted. They show the chainlink fence and then what? Nothing.

    That little Sikh kid did a better job – so much more natural – than the other actors.

  6. natz_mm   November 3, 2008 at 10:11 am

    I’ve only scene the Deol’s dancing in that song, that was enough to put me off the movie

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    If Patrick Henry were alive today, he’d say – Give us Dharam Singh Deol/Abhay Deol or Give us Death.

  7. aditya_k   November 5, 2008 at 10:53 am

    just read your review on koi mil gaya-you said bollywood actors seldom get to exhibit their acting skills ,given the hopeless scripts….. couldn’t agree more….

  8. aditya_k   November 7, 2008 at 7:00 am

    has the movie ‘a wednesday’ released in U.S.? do try to watch it….its good…..anupam kher and nasseruddin shah are fantastic…

    SearchIndia.com Responds:

    You write above: has the movie ‘a wednesday’ released in U.S.?

    We don’t think so, at least not widely. Based on other readers recommendation, we got the DVD from the Indian grocery store but the damn thing wouldn’t work in our player & we had to return it.

    Yes, we watched the SRK/Juhi Chawla film Yes, Boss. What a pathetic piece of shit. The villain is Aziz Mirza (story & direction) for penning the most awful story. SRK, Ashok Saraf (the guy who played Johnny) & Juhi were OK..Aditya lacked the smoothness of the serial seducer. Yes, there were some humorous moments.

  9. sganeshkumar1989   November 8, 2008 at 1:17 am

    //Heroes – Boring Indian Army Recruitment Ad//
    Good comment! 😀 The film just tried to cash in on some old beaten-to-death patriotic sentiments! 🙁

  10. beni   November 18, 2008 at 9:31 pm

    gosh, you guys make me laugh!!..in a good way of course!
    love the review

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