Incredible India 66 – Death by Telephone, Slap Tightens Bond, Kill the Girl Child

In Incredible India, things happens that would be considered bizarre in other lands but are perfectly normal by our standards.

Here are a few strange normal events in Mera Bharat Mahaan in recent days:

* Slap Tightens Friendship – Just one day after being at the receiving end of an assault from King Khan i.e Shahrukh Khan, Bollywood thief and joker Shirish Kunder is telling the media:

Being the younger, I should have not reacted like this. Our relationship has become stronger like never before.

Guess that’s why Darpok Salman Khan also murdered pavement dwellers in Mumbai while driving drunk. After all, by the weird Bollywood logic greater the injury to the victim tighter the bond.

* Girl Children Meet Maker Sooner – Behind the nice-sounding beti, girls, whether in the womb, as infants, children or adults have a hard time in India. A recent United Nations study has found that not only is female infant mortality higher than that of males but girl child mortality is terrible in India. For every 56 male child deaths, there were 100 female child deaths. The picture for girl children (1-5) in India is worse than in the hellholes of Pakistan, Sri Lanka, Egypt and Iraq. We guess the situation will become so grim that in the not too distant future Indian men will have to marry men or polyandry a la Draupadi style will come into effect.

* Planning a Strike? Think Again – India is a land of many thugs but the biggest thugs are in the government. Bihar’s Health Minister Ashwini Kumar Choubey threatened to cut off the hands of doctors who were planning to go on strike for an increase in their stipend. And you schmucks thought the Taliban was only in Afghanistan. With leaders like Choubey, no wonder Bihar is still in the stone age.

* Made in India? No, Made in Vietnam – The country that prides itself on writing software for the world and answering tech support calls from America can’t even manufacture decent mosquito nets. We are now importing mosquito nets from Vietnam. How long before we start technology transfer from Bangladesh or Nepal?

* Death by Telephone – Bizarre things happen in Mera Bharat Mahaan. Just the other day a young fella Manjunath S Gopal died in Bangalore after touching the landline telephone to answer a call. It seems a high-tension power line had come in contact with the telephone line electrocuting the 20-year-old Manjunath. Only in Incredible India can a landline telephone kill you.

Hey, what’s that noise?

That must be Manjunath’s bereaved family singing that dirge, Mera Bharat Mahaan!

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