Dai Machchi, Indha Surya Padam oru Sori Padam da. Sori Padam. (Hey buddy, this is a scabies-infested movie).
An ugly movie beyond redemption, Ayan is the latest piece of shit to emerge from the Augean sewers of Kollywood.
With not even a fig leaf of a story to cover its ugly entrails, Ayan’s raison d’etre is that a few agents of Lucifer at AVM and Sun Pictures had more money than they knew what to do with – so, they flushed it down the toilet and lo, at the other end of the sewer pipe emerged Ayan.
Zero Entertainment Value
Featuring Surya, Tamanna, Prabhu and two escapees from the Vandalur Zoo answering to the taunts of Akashdeep Sehgal and Jegan and directed by a nincompoop called K.V.Anand, Ayan offers zero entertainment value. Zilch.
With a story not in the least bit credible or gripping, the acting so mediocre and music below average, Ayan left us numb with shock at the amateurishness of it all.
Not for one moment in the two hours and 40 minutes did we get our money’s worth ($12 for the ticket).
The silly story centers around a young smuggler Deva (Surya) jetting around the world on smuggling trips for his mentor Das (Prabhu) and making the Indian Customs look like a bunch of buffoons.
A long-haired cartoon character Akashdeep Sehgal plays the villain Kamalesh. If someone were to stick a tail to this Akashdeep character, it’d be completelyÂ at home in the Vandalur Zoo as would Jegan who plays Deva’s sidekick Chitti.
Not content merely with making the Indian law enforcement authorities look like a bunch of blithering idiots in this ceaseless affront of a movie, Ayan director Anand adds insult to injury by bizarrely rewarding one of the professional smugglers with the plum government job of Professional Consultant/Officer. Don’t even try to justify this as a reward for assistance rendered in the cause of justice. Some reward. Some justice.
Surya – Mediocre Show
Surya once again delivers a embarrassingly poor performance. Whether on a smuggling mission in Congo, racing around like a maniac in Malaysia or cavorting with his lady love Tamanna, this fella disappoints. Big time.
Even Surya’s dialog delivery lacks pizzazz.
Worse, the clown doesn’t even seem to make an effort, perhaps in asinine hopes that his broad chest will deliver the goods.
At this rate, Surya will have as much success in Kollywood as his old man Sivakumar had in his heydays, which is very little.
Tamanna plays Yamuna, Surya’s lady love in the movie.
Given the sophomoric nonsense of a story, the Mumbai lass doesn’t have much of a role in Ayan except to act like a retard at frequent intervals.
While Tammana is without doubt a better actress than the ugly Kollywood trinity of Nayantara, Trisha and Shriya, we wouldn’t put her in the Meera Jasmine, Sandhya, Navya Nair or Padmapriya category.
By the way, we found Tamanna’s smile bewitching. Sweeeet.
We were not entranced by Ayan’s music either.
What about the picturization of the songs, you ask? Pathetic, in one word. Same old, same old – a bunch of clowns tromping up and down.
Worse, the characters in Ayan break out in songs at the oddest moments. Like for instance when Surya is released from the lockup at the police station, Surya and Tamanna suddenly break out in that stupid Nenje Nenje song.
Never in the history of Tamil movies has there been a song as repulsively picturized as Honey Honey.
Also, will someone please tell Surya and Tamanna that jumping like monkeys reaching for their bananas on a tall tree is not the same as dancing.
So Much for So Little
It boggles the mind that the remorseless bozos behind Ayan went around the world (Malaysia, Namibia and other parts of Africa) to bring us this hellish nightmare. Talk of squandering money.
There were about 25 people for the opening show. The audience didn’t seem to be very engaged with the movie going by the constant chitchat and people walking out.
There weren’t many people waiting for the 7PM show either when we came out around 6:35PM ET. Perhaps, it was the bad weather on the East Coast.
Or maybe word had spread that this piece of trash a.k.a. Ayan is best shown the middle finger.
SearchIndia.com strongly recommends that you stay away from the offensive nightmare that is Ayan if you value your sanity and if you value your money in these hard economic times.
Sori Padam. Tu. Tu
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