Chikni Chameli – Ugly, Slutty, Trashy

Dear God,

Have you lost it completely?

Never mind. That was just a rhetorical question.

We find it so distressing that your callous indifference to the most basic elements of quality has reached epic heights.

That you could allow such a loathsome and disgustingly crude item number like Chikni Chameli to see the light of the day can only mean Satan is now the guiding hand behind your actions.

Art is obviously no longer your domain!

Shocked as we’re at the ugly spectacle of Chikni Chameli, we confess it’s not a complete surprise considering the person at the center of that perversity.

Katrina – Sheer Agony

Of all the horrid Indian starlets we’ve had the misfortune to behold, this British import Katrina Kaif has the least class.

Be it in her dance moves, her acting, her gait or her talk, Katrina Kaif is a monument, God, to your folly.

Garbed in as little attire as possible, the woman thinks, in deluded fashion, surely, that thrusting her tits forward, obscenely shaking her derriere and crudely spreading her legs wide, is the acme of seductive moves.

Mon dieu, seductive it is not.

Slutty, it most certainly is.

In a sane world guided by a wise hand, creatures like Katrina Kaif would not be within 100-feet of a camera.

We have not the slightest doubt that your Indian acolytes, whose reckless ceaseless breeding has raised their numbers to 1.2 billion, will love the Chikni Chameli item number because it’s in the nature of those savages to embrace filth of any kind.

The trashier it gets the tighter their embrace.

Dear not-so-almighty, we pray that the Satanic influence on you abates soon.

Your most skeptical former devotee,

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