Now You Know Why India has No Hope

If SI has said it once, SI has said it a million times.

Mera Bharat Mahan a.k.a. India has no hope.

So what if a few people can spell PHP, Ruby, Perl, JavaScript and SAP.

But the Indian DNA is rotten to the core.

Salman Khan - Most Searched Person on BingSalman Khan – Devil in Human Form
(Image courtesy – Microsoft MSN)

Why My Angst?

Microsoft announced the Most Searched Person in India in its Bing search engine for 2013 this morning.

And the answer is, hold your breath now, Salman Khan. πŸ™

Of the countless chutiyas populating that bizarre land, Salman Khan is one of the worst.

A Shaitan (devil) in human form, Salman Khan is a depraved creature given to beating his girl-friends and driving drunk over sleeping pavement dwellers in Mumbai and then running away without aiding the dying and injured!

Still Indians’ love for this gaandu is unparalleled!

That millions of Indians should genuflect at the altar of a savage beast like Salman Khan and hunger for information about him on Bing and other search engines is senseless hero-worship that brings shame to all of India.

Now you know why that godforsaken, benighted land is doomed.

Most Searched in U.S.

Since SI’s home land is the U.S., I am providing a chart on the “Most Searched Person” and “Most Searched Movie” in Amreeka as well.

Most Searched Person in the U.S.

Most Searched Person in the U.S.

15 Responses to "Now You Know Why India has No Hope"

  1. unknownvirus   December 3, 2013 at 1:17 am

    Check this out. It aired yesterday and right around the 5th minute, this choot makes an ass of himself Responds:

    I watched the above video for 12-minutes and stopped.

    Utter garbage.

    This obsession with the Chutiya’s marriage, virginity etc!

    They’re making monkeys out of the audience!

    All part of Salman’s “Being Human” image-makeover fraud!

  2. Aswin_Kini   December 3, 2013 at 9:47 am

    Before we go any further into the “India is rotten to the core” crap again, are you sure you want to rely on Microsoft’s claim, especially considering that Bing is by far the poorest of search engines?

    I would be more interested in what Google has to say…. Afterall, who in the hell uses Bing to search content?
    Please check Google results in India, you may find more shittier stuff, but nothing more absurd than Salman Khan being the most popular person in the Indian Cyber World???? Who the hell cares about him anyway?? Responds:

    1. True, Bing lags google in market share but that’s no reason to dismiss the survey.

    2. You are wrong in saying that people don’t care about him. I saw a headline somewhere that Koffee with Karan featuring Salman had a high TRP rating.

    • rajesh jagetia   December 3, 2013 at 11:15 pm

      Even in google, Salman Khan is most searched male celebrity and that is not for this year only.

      For last 10 years or so, he is most searched male celebrity in google also even when his movies were flopping left, right and centre. Responds:

      Most definitely, this Chutiya a.k.a. Salman Khan employs a P.R. firm.

      • rajesh jagetia   December 3, 2013 at 11:20 pm

        And, just see no. of facebook likes for him, highest for any bollywood actor including other Khans, behind may be Sachin and A R Rehman only. Responds:

        As I said earlier, there’s a lot of image manipulation and P.R. going on behind the scenes.

        Plus Indians have a tendency to worship all the wrong “Gods.”

      • rvasam   December 5, 2013 at 3:07 pm

        Yes, not only that, articles about him are abundant in every desi website on a daily basis including samachar, indiatimes, yahoo india, rediff, and so on……

        FYI.. my whole family loathes him a lot…. we have nicknamed our toilet bowl as “Sallu.”

        In fact, when my kids say I need to go the bathroom, they say I need to Sallu πŸ™‚ Responds:

        You write: when my kids say I need to go the bathroom, they say I need to Sallu

        Super! πŸ˜‰

        Wouldn’t it be wonderful if the expression “I need to Sallu” catches on in a big way with Indians everywhere.

        I yearn for the day when Dadas, Dadis and Doctors start asking kids, Beta, did you have a good Sallu today? Or Beta, did you Sallu your undies again?

  3. Aswin_Kini   December 3, 2013 at 9:51 am

    And by the way, I am not very sure that you should be worrying about India, especially seeing that the most searched person in US is not Obama, Dick Cheney, Bill Clinton, Bill Gates, or Steve Jobs, but someone Hollywood Hottie named Beyonce Knowles.

    By the way, 6 of the top 10 results in 2013 (US) are either washed-up celebrities or attention-seeking wannabes….. I guess that clearly suggests that people all over the world are no less shittier. Responds:

    Cheney, Jobs, Clinton, Obama are not worthy souls either. The first three are chutiyas.

    Better BeyoncΓ© than Salman.

    Obsession with celebrities suggests that most people in the world are unhappy with their lives and yearn for something different. πŸ™

    • boopalanj   December 5, 2013 at 4:48 am

      Seems they got a name for this kind of obsession – Celebrity Worship Syndrome.

      People are rated on a scale of 34, and being classified into three categories – Entertainment-Social / Intense-personal / Borderline-pathological.

      Also it suggests, that this is related to mental health issues.

      Going by this study, 95% of Indians are mentally affected and the rest 5% are blind πŸ˜‰ Responds:

      The last sentence is the best you’ve ever written! πŸ˜‰

      100% True!

      You and I must be the last sane ones on the planet!

  4. sam   December 3, 2013 at 9:53 am


    Offtopic: Whats your opinion on the new kid on the block in Delhi elections? AAP , Arvind Kejriwal. Do you think ppl would vote for him, coz of his ” clean the system” slogan? Responds:

    1. Whether Kejriwal wins or not is irrelevant because real change can only come within the institutional setting of a large party or through mass violence.

    My preference is for mass violence because it’s faster than the slow party-based political process.

    I do hope Kejriwal wins though because new faces are good. Entrenched power tends to be more corrupt.

    BTW, New Yorker had a piece on Kejriwal a few months back.

    2. In my view, one of the best Reform Tools in any democracy is fixing Term Limits for politicians at all levels of Government.

  5. rvasam   December 5, 2013 at 1:27 pm

    BTW, this chutiya Sallu is getting a new trial.

    Check out Responds:

    Thanks! I was not aware of the latest ‘old ploy of delay, delay, delay’ development.

    Ah, the tragedy of Indian judicial system – Justice Delayed is Justice Denied (in this case, justice has been denied to the poor pavement dweller who died and the several that were injured because of this drunk-driving monster Salman Khan).

    And to think Rahul Gandhi went to this savage beast’s house! πŸ™

    That’s enough reason to never vote for the Congress!

  6. rajesh jagetia   December 6, 2013 at 5:51 am

    And now he is trending on twitter for just a poster of his upcoming movie “Jai Ho”

  7. rvasam   March 13, 2014 at 12:15 pm

    I am now speechless πŸ™ πŸ™ Responds:

    Let me see if I’ve understood your links right.

    So if an Indian woman in Bastar, Villupuram, Varanasi or Doddaballapur wants to pee in private, I have to hug a murderer and pay him Rs 10,000!

    Un’F*cking’Believable! Only in that Chutiya Country!

    For the women’s sake, I hope this is not a joke! πŸ™

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